WELCOME TO RIVER DAVES PLACE

On a lighter note - Political jokes & memes

Q4mtxUS

Q4mtxUS

Well-Known Member
Joined
May 19, 2014
Messages
1,732
Reaction score
2,594
IMG_6784.jpeg
 
D

DunePilot

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 15, 2020
Messages
2,301
Reaction score
10,973
A MESSAGE FROM KING CHARLES III:

To the citizens of the United States of America from His Sovereign Majesty King Charles III.

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)

His Sovereign Majesty King Charles III will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except North Dakota, which he does not fancy).

Your new Prime Minister, Rishi Sunak, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections.

Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').

2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'

3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.

5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.

8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.

9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).

12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.

13.. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).

15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

God Save the King!
 
Wedgy

Wedgy

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jan 18, 2020
Messages
10,637
Reaction score
16,319
I can't find anything anywhere in the book that says we can't play...
 
rmarion

rmarion

Stop The Steal
Joined
Mar 14, 2008
Messages
14,916
Reaction score
36,543
t.me

TruckersForFreedom

How to deal with a black woman throwing shit at you. Protect yourself from EMF, 5G and Wifi radiations with a tested and proven product the best in the market: https://dq271.isrefer.com/go/AultHome/AUL651/ Follow us on twitter: https://twitter.com/MigrantsOut Join the healing group...
t.me t.me
 
D

DunePilot

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 15, 2020
Messages
2,301
Reaction score
10,973
www.americanlibertyreportnews.com

The FBI Has Slaughtered 4 Americans Including at Least 2 Trump Supporters This Month - American Liberty Report

Within days of Tucker Carlson’s interview with Donald Trump on Twitter/X, it is now the most-watched interview in human history, with over 255 million views. Tucker asked Trump a chilling question during the interview. Following years of protests, the fake Russia hoax, two failed impeachments...
www.americanlibertyreportnews.com www.americanlibertyreportnews.com



Within days of Tucker Carlson’s interview with Donald Trump on Twitter/X, it is now the most-watched interview in human history, with over 255 million views. Tucker asked Trump a chilling question during the interview. Following years of protests, the fake Russia hoax, two failed impeachments and now four indictments, isn’t the next step for them to simply kill President Trump?

It’s a chilling question because the FBI has been on a killing spree in the month of August, carrying out what look like targeted political assassinations against Americans and Trump supporters in particular.

We’ve already reported on the first incident in which this happened. 75-year-old Craig Robertson was a disabled veteran and beloved churchgoer in Provo, Utah. He was the sole caretaker for his blind son. All of his neighbors loved him and said he was a valuable member of the community who is no danger to anyone. Robertson had to use a mobility scooter in the grocery store.

An FBI paramilitary hit squad arrived at Robertson’s home in a pre-dawn raid. The FBI claims that Robertson opened the door with a .357 Magnum in his hand and pointed it at them. They shot him dead. But is that what happened?

The FBI threw a flashbang grenade and a smoke bomb at Robertson’s feet before they killed him over Facebook posts that Joe Biden didn’t like. Did Robertson’ really point the gun at the FBI, or did he simply throw his hands up defensively as any person would do in that situation? The FBI won’t say, and the media is wildly incurious.

The agents then casually stood around chatting as the kind and elderly Trump support bled out underneath a blanket on his front sidewalk.

None of the FBI agents in the assassination wore bodycams, despite a 2022 executive order mandating visual recordings of all FBI raids.

Theodore Deschler was a 100% disabled veteran living with his mother in Henderson, Tennessee. When the FBI pounded on the front door and the mother answered it, they yanked her outside and put her in the back of a police vehicle. When she asked what was happening, they told her, “It’s none of your business.”

Agents then proceed to break every window in the home by throwing tear gas grenades and flash bangs inside. When Theodore Deschler, who suffers from severe PTSD and depression, tried to run out the front door to escape the smoke, agents shot him dead. He was unarmed and had no access to firearms. He left two bloody handprints on the front door, which is what you do when you don’t have a gun in your hand.

The only explanation from the FBI as to why they were even at the Deschler residence was because the 100% disabled veteran was described as “right wing,” which is FBI-speak for “a Trump supporter.” There was no bodycam footage of the incident.

I think it might be time for some of the veterans’ rights groups to start getting a little louder about this crap—very soon.

The third victim was 32-year-old Ahmed Assed, a largely harmless autistic Muslim man. He had been previously hospitalized for mental illness after he was found babbling in a public park (and not harming anyone). There’s no explanation at all for why the FBI shot him dead inside his family’s Albuquerque home, and obviously no bodycam footage. The family says there were no firearms in the home.

In Philadelphia, the FBI shot and killed an unarmed black man named Tahiem Weeks-Cook. Weeks-Cook was supposedly wanted on a robbery warrant. But do you know what’s really odd? No one has heard of Tahiem Weeks-Cook. When was the last time that a law enforcement agency shot and killed an unarmed black man and the media steadfastly refused to talk about it, let alone gin up race riots?

The FBI routinely arrests white cops in small towns for petty BS like sending each other “racist” jokes via text messages. But when the FBI shoots and kills an unarmed black man… well, that’s fine. Whatever. These things just happen sometimes. Naturally, the FBI has released no information on the killing of Weeks-Cook, and no one was wearing a body camera.

Not to worry, though. The FBI always investigates itself whenever it has an agent involved shooting, and it always finds its brave, heroic agents innocent of any wrongdoing.
 
rmarion

rmarion

Stop The Steal
Joined
Mar 14, 2008
Messages
14,916
Reaction score
36,543
t.me

The Voice of Q

WATCH: Both United States Press Secretaries confirm that Joe Biden is not the President of the United States making decisions, it’s Barack Obama calling the shots Jen Psaki: “I love working for President Obama” Karine Jean-Pierre: “So today as you all saw just an hour or so ago President...
t.me t.me

just a little Freudian slip up
 
rmarion

rmarion

Stop The Steal
Joined
Mar 14, 2008
Messages
14,916
Reaction score
36,543
20230904_185358.jpg


just another typical conspiracy theory..

I can't believe people would even spend an ounce of breath... researching this shit....
 
Wedgy

Wedgy

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jan 18, 2020
Messages
10,637
Reaction score
16,319
Haha!
The struggle is real! I just learned Turdsday how to undo recurring fat finger losses of lengthy unsaved email compositions... :D
 
Taboma

Taboma

Well-Known Member
Joined
Apr 4, 2008
Messages
15,796
Reaction score
22,946
Wedgy said:
Haha!
The struggle is real! I just learned Turdsday how to undo recurring fat finger losses of lengthy unsaved email compositions... :D
Click to expand...
Would that be before or after you've pushed the "Send" button ? I don't normally notice until it's already been carried away into cyber space 😖
 
Wedgy

Wedgy

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jan 18, 2020
Messages
10,637
Reaction score
16,319
Taboma said:
Would that be before or after you've pushed the "Send" button ? I don't normally notice until it's already been carried away into cyber space 😖
Click to expand...
During composition, when is supposed to auto-save, but nooooo... Poof! Final score: saves - 1. fat fingers - 1.
Yep .500 avg. Oh yeah...
 
rmarion

rmarion

Stop The Steal
Joined
Mar 14, 2008
Messages
14,916
Reaction score
36,543
t.me

Może Być 😅😅😅 in Free Energy 🪫⚡️🛢

t.me t.me

L17 A

nothing to search here..


news.mit.edu

Controlling genes with light

New technique can rapidly turn genes on and off, helping scientists better understand their function.
news.mit.edu news.mit.edu

Light Control of Nuclear Gene mRNA Abundance and Translation in Tobacco - PMC

Photosynthetic signals modulate expression of nuclear genes at the levels of mRNA transcription, mRNA stability, and translation. In transgenic tobacco (Nicotiana tabacum), the pea (Pisum sativum) Ferredoxin 1 (Fed-1) mRNA dissociates from ...
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

just a little fact check, before the SHILL arrives

I hope the RDP Vaxed received the placebo jab.
 
Last edited:
Wedgy

Wedgy

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jan 18, 2020
Messages
10,637
Reaction score
16,319
Well, they'd better have good aim 'cause they sure as hell don't want to start a gunfight on this street in this town..
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top