Old Saying’s…..😎

[TPC]

When you are in love or in debt, someone else has the advantage.

 

[TPC]

Either you run the day or the day runs you.

 

[Rajobigguy]

When it comes to squirrels, we are at the top of the tree.

Slower than molasses on a cold winter morning, running uphill against the wind.

More nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

“It’s always in the last place you look”
Of course it is, once you found it why would you keep looking.

It’s impossible to make anything idiot proof because when it comes to ruining things idiots are so ingenious.

If you don’t like this speed you’re really going too hate the other gear.
(Can be used for too slow or too fast)

He knows everything that there is to know about everything that doesn’t count..

Each and every day God presents us with a series of challenges and opportunities. Today’s challenges are there to prepare us for tomorrow’s opportunity’s.

 

[Rajobigguy]

The wife always tells me that I used to have the body of a Greek god and now I just look like a god damn Greek.

 

[Desert Whaler]

When something is close or siimilar, my Pops will say that it's, 'Purt-n-near'.

 

[oldboatsrule]

It'll feel better when it quits hurting.

Me: have you drank enough beer?
Dad: Do motorcycles have doors?
Also Dad: Do horses have kickstands?

Me: Do you want another beer?
Dad: Does a duck fart underwater?
Dad again: Is a frogs ass watertight?
Still Dad: Does a hobby horse have a hickory dick?

 

[TonyFanelli]

Does a bear shit in the woods? Apparently not anymore, we've got pink and blue bears that have nicer houses than me who wipe their asses with charmin on commercials! Don't think polar bears do either...

 

[cole_skier]

Shaking like a parakeet shitting a peach seed.

 

[Ouderkirk]

It's like picking gnat shit out of pepper.

You can want in one hand and shit in the other, and see which one fills up first.

one of life's greatest pleasures...to be able to tell someone to go to hell, and have them genuinely looking forward to the trip.

 

[fishfyter]

Can't fix stupid

That went over like a fart in church

 

[Eliminator21vdrive]

I just updated a project and thought of this.


Good from afar but far from good!

 

[traquer]

40 yard fakeout

Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you're really abusing the privilege

 

[LazyLavey]

She's got legs up to her ass

 

[BajaT]

 

[Lumpy]

Fuck around and find out

 

[Lumpy]

Bitches be crazy

 

[Lumpy]

You must wait at least three seconds before preforming this action

 

[Lumpy]

Shall I continue?

 

[4Waters]

Never trust a fart

 

[MissB]

couple
Favorite: If you don't want them to get your goat, don't let them know it's tied up.
You can marry more money in 5 minutes, than you can make in a lifetime.
A lion never loses sleep over the opinions of sheep.

 

[Hi-Jacked]

Its colder than a witches' tit on the north side of an iceberg.

 

[ltbaney1]

My neighbor is a finish carpenter/cabinet maker - "Caulk and Paint, make us what we ain't"

bondo and paint, make a sinner a saint.

 

[ltbaney1]

I just updated a project and thought of this.


Good from afar but far from good!

we do it nice, because we do it twice!

 

[Eliminator21vdrive]

If you can't fix it fuck it up so nobody can

Not enough time to do it right but plenty of time to do it over.

 

[LuauLounge]

A lie is as good as the truth if you can get enough people to believe you.

 

[Rajobigguy]

Always do a good job because when you’re up to your ass in alligators, people will remember that it was your job to drain the swamp.

 

[Eliminator21vdrive]

If it aint broke fix it till it is!

 

[farmo83]

Grandpa:

Me and you,mostly you, are gonna get this shit done.

 

[coolchange]

Life is a shit sandwich, the more bread you have, the less shit you have to eat.

 

[old rigger]

One of my dad's that I heard more than a few times growing up...

'If you don't knock this shit off ( or "if you don't straighten up") you and I are going to be taking a 3 legged hike to the hospital to get my foot outta your ass"

 

[Mini Kat]

My dad told me way back as a kid be careful Wayne if it bleeds it will breed. Another one he told me was remember tight is tight too tight is broken. And don't try to tighten it when it's hot it will break. I was a very rebellious kid.
He proved himself right on all of them....LMAO

 

[76 Hondo]

Does a Rag Doll have cloth Tits?

 

[jesco]

Had a foreman years ago that always called the new guy "Son"... When they would finally ask why, he would say "I dont call you son cause you shine, I call you son cause your mine!!!" and keep calling them "son" until they snapped or a new guy would show up and he would move on to them. I started calling him dad back in front of people and the Superintendent on the project really thought I was his son so I was treated better, hahaha. When he found out what was going on and that I was taking advantage of it, he stopped.

I use "Dont let your alligator mount get you chick ass in trouble" all the time when my son or one of my buddies start popping off.

 

[Tamalewagon]

When asked "how are things going?" my standard reply "same shit...different shovel".

 

[Familyties]

Don't let your meat loaf.

 

[JBZ]

The proper quip is "colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra".
Remember Dad saying " if I have to take off this belt" but he never did.
Hornier than a two-pecketed Billy goat.
You really screwed the pooch this time.

Anytime Grandpa was leaving, he'd always pat himself down and say "spectacles, testicles, wallet and watch".
"Good, better best, never let it rest, until good is better, and better is best.
Before a date: Behave yourselves. If you can't do that, don't name it after me.

 

[TPC]

“Just because it’s dangerous, doesn’t mean it won’t be fun”

 

[Rajobigguy]

“ Hold my beer” !!

 

[Rajobigguy]

“ Hold my beer” !!

 

[spectra3279]

It's colder than a witches titty in a brass bra

 

[liquid addiction]

Well it ain’t gunna suck itself!

 

[liquid addiction]

"It is what it is". I've never understood that one.

I always come back with “ well it can’t be what it ain’t “

 

[fat rat]

Another one of my dads favorite.

The shits gonna hit the fan….if you don’t act right!

 

[chadzilla]

"Ten pounds of shit in a five pound bag"
"loaded down like a pack mule"
This one is my favorite and yes I came up with it. A little back story. A friend and I were tasked with a last minute job on a boat that was just sold. typical salesman promised the world to a customer. We had to install radar, GPS, an inverter and an extra battery bank. 30 plus hour job and we had one day to do it. Trying to run 1/0 battery cables to the inverter through the only hole available that was already full of rigging. No chance of enlarging the hole. Fought it a bit before we were successful. When we were done, I rattled off "that was tighter than 3 dicks in a 2 dick hole". Fucked if I know how I came up with that... We laughed our asses off though!!

 

[Thing One]

"What, are you sawed off at the legs? Get it yourself"....

 

[pronstar]

Can’t swing a dead cat without hitting something…

Who swings dead cats???

 

[Rayson1971]

That's not going anywhere. ( After you snap a tie down, you just tightened.)

 

[farmo83]

I hear better then I see, I hear your saying your getting shit done, but I don't see it.

 

[Cooter01]

Do the world a favor and pull your lip over your head and swallow.

Grumpy Old Men (1993) clip with quote Do the world a favor and pull your lip over your head and swallow. Yarn is the best search for video clips by quote. Find the exact moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. Easily move forward or backward to get to the...

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[RIVERBORN]

Not a old saying,
But when I carry something heavy or awkward and someone asks “got it”
I usually say “yep, till I don’t”