What do you know about being an old man?

[Loony Toon]

I've come to understand where the term "You Old Fart" comes from.

 

[Gramps]

Up in Mammoth. There is a nice stream right behind where I took that pic.

I met @Xring01 up there and he got me Fuckin shit faced on that amazing bourbon he makes.

Good times!

Sherwin Creek Campground
(760) 924-5500

https://g.co/kgs/CWxDgxg

Back In the 1950's we use to live in what is now the Sherwin Campground!!!!!

 

[lbhsbz]

The dog wakes up and barks from the sound of my knees/hip/ankle/back popping upon my transition to vertical when I get up at night to take a piss. the first 10 steps are always a gamble lol....must be how Ford drivers feel getting in their truck to go to work in the morning

 

[Todd Mohr]

whiteworks said:
That being said what are some tricks you’ve picked up that make it not quite as shitty of a deal?

I do 100 push ups every day, I have over 600 days straight. I stretch 4-5 times a week, always take the stairs, take the dog on walks, etc. As Clint says, just don't let the old man in. Eat in moderation, take your lunch to work, don't regularly eat at fast food places.

 

[Sandlord]

Farts may not always be as funny as they once were.

 

[TexasJet]

I just turned 80 last September. I think a good part of living to an old age is genetics. In my case I work out at the gym 3 days a week for about 90 minutes each day. I rarely eat fried foods and not big portions of what I do eat. I am retired but very active every day. I have a 25 X 60 foot garden and about 24 head of cattle. I weigh myself every morning and am always aware of how what I eat will effect my weight. I don't smoke and drink moderately. I could ramble on about a lot of little things I think are important but I won't. Finally, I have a good mental image of myself. Your self image is very important to your overall health I think. I hope my narrative helps.

 

[jetboatperformance]

73+ still work both my business 5 1/2 days a week , "take care of the wife", tend to my ranch and chores , Two new knees , one hip and a life flight to Standford, losing weight (need to) Drink Beer daily (need to) , quit smoking cigarettes many years ago , I cook most of our meals .... some rules : never trust a fart, write copius notes, never waste a boner .... Tune in for more "Pro tips" on aging

 

[liquid addiction]

1.2M views · 10K reactions | #followerseveryone #funnyreels | Stephan Stapelberg

#followerseveryone #funnyreels.

www.facebook.com

Good example I just found.

 

[rivermobster]

I really think i need need to do a better job of committing to this kind of program. The lazier I get, the more uncomfortable I become.

Inertia.

A body at rest, stays at rest. A body in motion, stays in motion.

You got this!

 

[Aqualung]

Four months short of 70. Work out so I can enjoy all of life's pleasures. Not hiding my own easter eggs, so my memory is still intact. Glad to wake up each day and give God, the thanks. Many great comments above, mostly appreciate what my parents and others, whom I respected, who went before me, cared to share so much wisdom with me.

 

[Mr. C]

When am I considered old is the biggest question

I mean. I can still get up and make a morning cocktail
Move around do some shit.
Make another.
Maybe a little more shit gets done.
Then it’s afternoon and I make another cocktail.
Dinner comes. Wife makes a great meal with wine included of course.
Seems to be working.


Ya ya I see the problem.

I need to eat more throughout the day.

 

[Havasu blue label]

You realize your regrets

Your body hurts for no reason

Your wife hasn’t called you by your name in the past 20 years

You feel good in your own skin and can sincerely compliment those that deserve it, and it means a lot to those you do compliment, and means even more to yourself.

That’s a good one 20 years

 

[MOUZER]

It's hard to hold in a fart when your walking around at Walmart

 

[MOUZER]

Also never trust a fart or waist a erection

 

[2Driver]

No one under 55 cares to hear what you have to say unless they are a salesperson trying to sell you something.

 

[wishiknew]

When you’re on the freeway and really gotta pee, I just find a nice wide shoulder area and pull over, turn on the hazards, walk around to the passenger’s side of the truck, open the door and pee toward the door hinge. I’ve found out that there is no shoulder on the 605 north from the 91 all the way to just before Rose Hills Rd….and that sucks when you’re stuck in traffic.

CHP does not like this trust me

 

[MOUZER]

CHP does not like this trust me

I pulled my big rig over on 15 by Temecula to pee while in mid pee between the cab and fuel tank a chp chick pulled up right next to me and over her loud speaker she said put that thing away laughing....I said it's cold outside

 

[Jefftowz]

It’s akin to 50 First Dates.

Hi, I’m Tom

 

[SoCalDave]

 

[DLC]

Buy multi packs of readers. Have them in each vehicle, every room in house, any desk you use. You get the picture.

Just take em from your wife and she’ll buy new ones….

For some reason she is always loosing her glasses

 

[mash on it]

I don't sleep as well.
Open heart surgery didn't help that.
Coffee is always made ready before bed.
I'll wake up at 2 am, and be wide awake.
Fu*k it. I'll brew the coffee. Drink half a pot, or more. Review gummy ads. Or YouTube.
5 am going to sleep.
6 am wake up "daylights burning" let's get shit done. Where's my glasses?
Fu*k it, beer me.
Tomorrow is no different.

Dan'l

 

[4Waters]

I hear you wake up at least 2 times a night to take a piss

 

[Willie B]

…Readers are …$1.50 …at The Dollar Tree…for those of you who have not been indoctrinated…

 

[X Hoser]

I’ve said it before….at 50, never pass up a bathroom. At 60 never trust a fart. At 70 never waste an erection!

 

[napanutt]

I hear you wake up at least 2 times a night to take a piss

I’m lucky if it’s only two.

 

[TPC]

That’s a good one 20 years

Seems like 100.

 

[TPC]

We don't call them Grand Kids anymore.
They are now called your homes Technology Advisors.

Wife had a brutal, fussy and complicated version of Maximo and our youngest often had to be on hand to get it to do the things that need to get done.

He was on the phone with her coworker nurses too.

Honors student, we left a note and him, nor his friends read or write cursive. Had no clue what we wrote.
I have really good handwriting too.

How do they sign their names?
X?

7-year-old Granddaughter fully reads and writes English, picking up good at High German (and she explained to me Schwiizerdütsch) and seems she was born knowing keyboards.
I don't think they learn keyboards; they just know it.

I'm a fallible old fool living in a fascinating, ever-changing world and enjoying every minute of it.

 

[whiteworks]

Talk to text is a good thing when you can’t see, the little microphone icon down by the keyboard is your friend. Between my fingers being numb from early stages of carpal tunnel and my eyes working better or worse on any given day, these damn phones being our lifeline to running a business, talk to text is my friend now LOL

 

[Caydens Cat]

I pulled my big rig over on 15 by Temecula to pee while in mid pee between the cab and fuel tank a chp chick pulled up right next to me and over her loud speaker she said YOU F*CK WITH THAT THING???....I said it's cold outside

Fixed

 

[LazyLavey]

Get up and get moving...

I do my stretchs, hit the weights, I'm up to 40 pushups now, and then a three to four mile walk.

If I DON'T do these things, my legs and back will ache like a bitch from a lifetime of working on cars.

Push it. Push it Real good. It keeps all the pain away.

Motion is lotion.

 

[Rajobigguy]

One of the things that I noticed as I’ve aged.
When I was in my 20’s and got a woody I could grab it both hands and even with a great deal of effort I could barely bend it.
In my 50’s with a little force I could bend it maybe 30-40 degrees. Now with 70 approaching fast I can use 3 fingers and just about fold that sucker in half.

I often wonder how much stronger I’m going to get,

 

[endobear]

Talk to text is a good thing when you can’t see, the little microphone icon down by the keyboard is your friend. Between my fingers being numb from early stages of carpal tunnel and my eyes working better or worse on any given day, these damn phones being our lifeline to running a business, talk to text is my friend now LOL

I fought with wicked carpal tunnel in both hands and trigger fingers for years. Getting cut open and fixed was life changing. I felt 10 years younger once everything healed. Simple tasks that were tough became normal again. My sleep improved a lot.

 

[Not So Fast]

Whats that sayin "The Golden Years" yeah thats it, and its bull shit, the Golden Years suck!!!!!!!!!!!! I have always been a healthy type guy up until we retired in 2002 (at age 62) and moved to Havasu, had a few pretty good years until 2011 and then the barn door opened, had something like 8 surgeries in the next few years and still going thru some other stuff, like Carotid artery suff right now, hopefully I make it out of it
BUT IT BEATS THE ALTERNATIVE LOL

 

[rrrr]

That being said what are some tricks you’ve picked up that make it not quite as shitty of a deal?

Having a good pain management physician is important.

 

[TPC]

Wife was off doing something so I took the Can Am up to the Pioneer Saloon in Goodsprings Nv.

A local Legend, Lary Glen sat next to me at the bar.
Lary, a retired LEO from Santa Barbara is a really entertaining guy.

Best impressionist I've ever heard, but most his characters are celebrities' only older guys know.
He does them all spot on amazing.

So Lary asks me if I "ever heard of Johnny Ray?"
Ya got to be an old guy to know that answer.

" Ya mean the Little White Cloud that Cried singer with the old school hearing aid?" - I answered.

I was probably the only person in Clark Country that knew that and Lary lit up.

Johnny Ray was well known for crying while he played the piano while wearing that cigarette pack size, old transistor radio style hearing aid with the wire dangling down from his ear.

Lary continued "He was my dad, I still have his hearing aid."

If you ever stop by the Pioneer Saloon in Goodsprings, by all means ask if lary is present and fire up a conversation.
Ask him to do his Rodney Dangerfield.

BTW: Johnny Ray didn't have a hearing problem.

 

[TimeBandit]

Wife was off doing something so I took the Can Am up to the Pioneer Saloon in Goodsprings Nv.

A local Legend, Lary Glen sat next to me at the bar.
Lary, a retired LEO from Santa Barbara is a really entertaining guy.
Best impressionist I've ever heard, but most his characters are celebrities' only older guys know.
He does them all spot on amazing.

So Lary asks me if I "ever heard of Johnny Ray?"
Ya got to be an old guy to know that answer.

" Ya mean the Little White Cloud that Cried singer with the old school hearing aid?" - I answered.

I was probably the only person in Clark Country that knew that and Lary lit up.
Johnny Ray was well known for crying while he played the piano, wearing that cigarette pack size, old transistor radio style hearing aid with the wire dangling down from his ear.

Lary continued "He was my dad, I still have his hearing aid."

If you ever stop by the Pioneer Saloon in Goodsprings, by all means ask if lary is present and fire up a conversation.
Ask him to do his Rodney Dangerfield.

My parents both taught at the Goodsprings school in the 1950s until it closed. they told a story about hiding textbooks under the floor in the auditorium, I don't know if such a building still exists.

 

[Lumpy]

56,
Last two weekends,
Did all the maintenance on the 270 and the 7.3 truck to haul all over creation…still pushing 60 pools a week on top of that. Feel like I just played two games of Rugby but after reading this thread…Im 40…tomorrow Ill feel like Im 80 but still taking the 270 out for a shake down at Lopez…then pushing the broom for another 4.5 days.

 

[stephenkatsea]

Reading Glasses - In my occupation, the fine print could be critical at times. I began using them in my early 50s. Have multiple pairs on hand. But, I found better than that was a float strap for glasses. They’re hanging around my neck at mostly all times. Fortunately, my far and mid range vision remains very good.

Weight - Get to a reasonable weight and do your best to keep it there.

Pain Doctors - Obviously just a band aid. If the real solution is at all do able, do it.

Falls - One of the major causes of senior fatalities and often very preventable.

 

[DWC]

…Readers are …$1.50 …at The Dollar Tree…for those of you who have not been indoctrinated…

I have a dozen floating around at any given time. I buy decent ones, wife buys me junk because i lose them.

 

[Willie B]

If one pair is too weak slap a second pair on...

… And if two pairs of readers don’t work… Buy a 4 inch magnifying glass and hold it close to the fine print… works like a charm. Ask me how I know.

 

[Wayn-o]

listen to your elders, they have wisdom. And get these and stick it to the back of your phone. Clips right on your beak and you always have readers.

 

[Cray Paper]

I turned got reader glasses at the end of 2024. Learning to keep them in reach, and available has been a challenge. I am 55 YO know and after 8 months of relying in readers I am not able to read text on a computer screen or mail. I also found out that my daily regime of Ibuprophen for alleviating my back and knee pains was escalating my blood pressure. Getting old is not for pussies.

 

[mark49]

View attachment 1492683

I'll be 71 on the 28th of April. I found that keeping my weight down. "BMI" is super important. My hearing is horrible, all the years hunting and shooting guns, front row concerts seats didn't help. My 2 cents would be, eat well, drink in moderation, hope you don't have cardo issues, and god forbid cancer. I'm still riding my motorcycle, have my boat in Havasu and doing pretty darn good.

 

[TPC]

I don't sleep as well.
Open heart surgery didn't help that.
Coffee is always made ready before bed.
I'll wake up at 2 am, and be wide awake.
Fu*k it. I'll brew the coffee. Drink half a pot, or more. Review gummy ads. Or YouTube.
5 am going to sleep.
6 am wake up "daylights burning" let's get shit done. Where's my glasses?
Fu*k it, beer me.
Tomorrow is no different.

Dan'l

I'm up now drinking coffee with the cat.
Dog snoring on the bed with the wife.

Cat followed me out to the gardening shed and caught a mouse in route. Quickly took it back into the house to feed the family.

Going to spray 1/4 acre with Round Up as soon as daylight breaks.
Blown-out hip and knees regardless, iron man it, live through the pain, get er' done.
Dodger game at 9:30 AM PST.

 

[TPC]

I have a dozen floating around at any given time. I buy decent ones, wife buys me junk because i lose them.

I buy them by the box off Amazon

350's.
I take a box with us on cruises.
Either I break them or fellow passengers do and we help them out.

Walmart occasionally has the sturdy, rubberized cheaters. Excellent if you can manage to find them. They sell fast and are most desirable.

 

[mark49]

I buy them by the box off Amazon

350's.
I take a box with us on cruises.
Either I break them or fellow passengers do and we help them out.

Walmart occasionally has the sturdy, rubberized cheaters. Excellent if you can manage to find them. They sell fast and are most desirable.

Dollar Tree A buck and quarter. Load up.

 

[TPC]

Dollar Tree A buck and quarter. Load up.

I'll have one in my breast pocket.
Pop the hood of the truck, strain and reach over to pull the oil dipstick,,,,, feel a crunch in my pocket, broken in half, both lenses pop'd out.
I ordered a box of Barbie cheaters for laughs. Wife wears them when no one is looking.

 

[napanutt]

I buy them by the box off Amazon

350's.
I take a box with us on cruises.
Either I break them or fellow passengers do and we help them out.

Walmart occasionally has the sturdy, rubberized cheaters. Excellent if you can manage to find them. They sell fast and are most desirable.

Same 5 pack I get, only 250’s, so far.

 

[dave29]

I swim laps twice a week. 1/2 hour nonstop. I take an aqua PT class twice a week which includes stretching and balance moves. Next I soak in the gym hot tub for 15 minutes after every session. You've got to keep moving.
One more thing......1-2 glasses of red wine every night to feel normal.

 

[cofooter]

… And if two pairs of readers don’t work… Buy a 4 inch magnifying glass and hold it close to the fine print… works like a charm. Ask me how I know.

Even better is to snap a picture with your phone and zoom in! Works great!