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How Not To Be "That Guy" When Invited On a Friend's Boat

GRADS

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I didn't write this but I thought it was spot on!

1) Food Don't be the guy that brings one bag of pretzel rods for a full day of boating. Eventually you will get hungry (especially after a few beverages) and when you do you will have to depend on the kindness of others to be fed properly. Mainly because they don?t want your drunk ass passing out due to lack of proper nutrition or falling off the boat. Consider bringing a sub sandwich, chopped fruit, veggies, chips or some other easy to transport food. Be gracious when someone does offer you their food and don't just take for granted that the host/hostess is supposed to feed you unless this was specifically implied.

2) Drinks Always bring twice what you can drink. Boating is a communal affair and you may have to share a couple beers. (Because there's always the person who came completely empty handed or underestimated their ability to consume beverages on a hot day). Also don't show up with just drinks, put them in a cooler and cover them with ice. Unless you?re bringing Fireball, we?ll make room in our cooler for that. And drink a water every now and again. Proper hydration will ensure that you don?t get too intoxicated and be "That Guy."

3) Guests Did you tell the captain you were bringing a friend/dog/child on their boat? Bringing tag-alongs without notice is a big no-no. Maybe that extra will overcrowd the boat, or pee on the carpet (I mean the dog not the friend) and some situations just aren?t kid friendly. Besides, now you are personally responsible for the care and feeding of your guest. You?re going to have to share your warm 6 pack and pretzel rods between 2 people now. Always check with your host/hostess before dragging along a sidekick. Yes, even you, beloved friend.

4) Smoking Always ask before lighting up on someone's boat. Once again these are expensive machines, and just because they're open air doesn't mean it's ok. Owners always fear that some drunk may put a burn hole in the seat. Be considerate and ask first and NEVER throw your butts in the water.

5) Littering Speaking of throwing things in the water. Absolutely nothing goes into the water that is not seaweed. Orange rinds, peanut shells, and such are no big deal but be mindful of your beer caps, cigarette butts, wrappers and cans. Litter is destructive and disgusting. In fact if you find a piece of trash in the water, pick it up and put it in a trash bin. Don't be a piggy.

6) Be Prepared Be sure you've brought all you need for fun in the sun. This includes sunscreen, sunglasses, chapstick, and a towel along with your food and drinks. Trust your friends when they say you need sunscreen or a water.

7) The Captain OK here's the deal: The captain is in charge of the boat. (The captain may not always be the one in the drivers seat) If he/she says it's time to go, it's time to go. If they ask you to move, sit down or shut up, do it. As fun and relaxing as boating is, it is the captains job to ensure the safety of all the people on their boat and they are liable for you. Also, the captain chooses the music or appoints a DJ, end of story.

8) Safety If you feel a "Hold my beer and watch this" moment coming up, just say no. Do not push anyone out of a moving boat or jump out of a moving boat. Do not hang out by the motor of a running boat. Don't try a double back flip off the platform. Don't sit on the rails at high speeds. In other words don't be dumb.

9) Passenger Etiquette Respect the boat! Don't step on seats, only hard surfaces if possible. Leave coolers on the floor. Don't bring any glass on board. Respect equipment including paddle boards and floats. Don't play with any buttons or switches. Don't try to start the boat while the captain is away. Don't try to "help" unless the captain asks you to.

10) Don't be late Nothing is more tiresome than sitting with a boat full of people waiting on that one person who didn't plan ahead. We could be out having fun, but no we're still at the dock because you just texted "On My Way!" from inside the beer store. Have some respect for your friends and get there when you are supposed to.

11) Disembarking Don't stand up until the boat is fully secure. Make sure you grab everything you brought with you on the boat. Make sure all trash has been cleared and put it in a proper place at the house. Ask for help if you need it.

Oh and if you get invited out regularly, offer to chip in for gas. A gas station gift card is the easy way to make this happen. That's it for now friends! Please let me know if you think of something else I can add!

A friend also mentioned that you should use spray sunscreen BEFORE getting on the boat. Sunscreen spray makes seats sticky and hard to clean. The lotion kind is better for your skin and the environment anyway.
 

Bigbore500r

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Good tips. My pet peeve is when somebody just sits there and aimlessly watches another boat float into you in slow motion. Not even a "hey...this boat is getting close". Or "should I push this boat away"
 

Uncle Dave

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Great post Grads.

Another pet peeve is the guest that tries to control everyone else's schedule.

Classic guest that shows up late delaying everyone, then announces as you cast off the dock they "need to be back by X time" when the group has a full day trip planned.

I turned right around, lassoed a cleat and told them to "get out, maybe well see you tonight then".

When I got a puzzled reaction as to what the big deal as - I replied Im not blowing 3 hours out of my day to be your personal water taxi.

If you can't go with the flow - maybe you need to buy your own boat.

UD
 

HST4ME

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All but one of my boats have one seat for a reason. :) The other seats 12 and it's amazing how many just bail when we hit the dock at the end of the day. Out of anything I appreciate most is who that choses to stick around, wipe things down, clean up, empty cans, throw the trash in the can or help in doing dock lines.
 

CoolCruzin

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How about the guests that act stupid not sure how to wipe down the boat so they watch .:bash:
 

Sleek-Jet

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This topic comes up every once in a while and here my responce to all those "rules". If I invite you on my boat, you are a guest. That means nothing is required of you other than show up and have a good time. There is enough food, drinks, and gas. Enjoy the day and relax.
 

HavasuHank

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This topic comes up every once in a while and here my responce to all those "rules". If I invite you on my boat, you are a guest. That means nothing is required of you other than show up and have a good time. There is enough food, drinks, and gas. Enjoy the day and relax.
This.
 

coolchange

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12. Take your Dramamine the night before. "Ya, no, I know you don't get sea sick. Just take it because you don't boat regularly"." I'll use the natural ginger cloves honey elixir thing." No, TAKE YOUR DRAMAMINE.
Family yacht trip. "Who's going?" Everybody. "I'm not going" WHY? "Because everyone is going" YOU HAVE TO GO< NIC NEEDS YOUR HELP. "NO". It's just MDR to Paradise cove. "NO"
So You know I wind up going.
Nancy is sick, Carly is going to throw up, Carly's friend is sea sick.
We're going back.
Looks at wife. THE FUCK DID I SAY???!!!
 

Uncle Dave

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+1, although I can not follow that rule when on someone else's boat. I have to take care of all gas and food and drinks for the day.

I always want to stay ahead of the game and follow all their rules of their boat. Jus in case I get a second invite [emoji106][emoji202]

Good guests somehow always seem to make good hosts.

UD
 

spectracular

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I think you hit the nail on the head with the good guests = good hosts comment. I wonder how much of this bad or good behavior is learned? I've had guests that did it have a clue I a boat, but their willingness to help, offer to help, and be aware enough of their surroundings was what made me want to invite them again...and the next time, they knew what to do and that made my job easier.
 

Uncle Dave

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When I actually invite people - I have everything covered and don't want or need to my guests to do anything other than have fun - and its covered - or I wouldn't be inviting you.


Everybody that has the time, doesn't get ill (a possibility on the ocean) will have a great time - I see to that as the host and Skipper. Ill bite my tongue most of the time if need be.



Now..., who gets invited back, and guys/couples I choose to spend time with are different thing entirely, and has a lot to do with Grads list of "that guys" and all of your comments.



UD
 

rivermobster

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This topic comes up every once in a while and here my responce to all those "rules". If I invite you on my boat, you are a guest. That means nothing is required of you other than show up and have a good time. There is enough food, drinks, and gas. Enjoy the day and relax.
I'm good with this...

As long as said guest is a non boater!

If I'm a guest, I always throw down for gas.
 

BHC Vic

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This topic comes up every once in a while and here my responce to all those "rules". If I invite you on my boat, you are a guest. That means nothing is required of you other than show up and have a good time. There is enough food, drinks, and gas. Enjoy the day and relax.

That's how I feel. Except the guest thing. Last time I invited a buddy and his wife and they brought two couples and a third wheel. It was still a great day but we needed to hit the marina mid day for more beers and snacks. A little inconvenient for me was all. Took a guys trip to cats eye then had to take a girls trip. Drunk chicks babbling gets old to me.
 

SuperJet

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This topic comes up every once in a while and here my responce to all those "rules". If I invite you on my boat, you are a guest. That means nothing is required of you other than show up and have a good time. There is enough food, drinks, and gas. Enjoy the day and relax.

Only rule I have is don't be a dumb ass. If I am inviting you out it is because I am already going, weather you take the offer or not. Fuel is never expected. My boat is small so wipe downs only take about 15 minutes. BUT if you are a regular and you are a boater that happens to bum a ride for one reason or another and you sit on your ass the whole day like you are vacation. You just might lose your spot in the future(nothing will be said and you won't know[emoji51])
 

SuperJet

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+1, although I can not follow that rule when on someone else's boat. I have to take care of all gas and food and drinks for the day.

I always want to stay ahead of the game and follow all their rules of their boat. Jus in case I get a second invite [emoji106][emoji202]

That's just going for the karma points. And I am guilty of this move also
 

nowski

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Hey! that's a speaker not a foot rest...
 
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