How do you not bring it home?

[ArizonaKevin]

We are going through some changes at work and the stress has just been ramped up 10 fold over the last month. I do my best to compartmentalize my life so my wife doesn't bear the brunt of it but over the last week or so she has been starting to notice my stress.

Those of you who work in much more stressful jobs than me, do you have any tips on not bringing that stress home to affect the personal life?

 

[Xring01]

Bourbon, and lots of it.

 

[lbhsbz]

This is the price you pay I think when you're one of the people that takes ownership and gives a shit about what you do.

 

[HOOTER SLED-]

Clock out...leave it at work....that easy ..why stress over things you have no control over? Well if you're fucking up.....you just better suck it up buttercup.....go to the gym or buy a set of drums...

 

[Nordie]

I am just honest with my wife, we are both in a management type of positions and we both get stressed. I usually just tell her it was a bad day, and she gets it, I don't like bringing work home with me but it tends to happen here and there, but after a couple beers I relax and go back to being a joking around husband and turn it off like a switch.

When she comes home after a bad day, working overtime and complaining about people calling off and such. I just let her vent and get it off of her chest, 50% of the conversation I miss, but I just let her vent. I'm not saying it's great advice, but it works for us.

If at all possible when you come home just say fuck it tomorrow is a new day.

The hardest part is getting the work calls later in the evening that will put people over the top, I've finally learned that my company phone gets turned off at 5pm, this helps a lot.

 

[Ziggy]

We are going through some changes at work and the stress has just been ramped up 10 fold over the last month. I do my best to compartmentalize my life so my wife doesn't bear the brunt of it but over the last week or so she has been starting to notice my stress.

Those of you who work in much more stressful jobs than me, do you have any tips on not bringing that stress home to affect the personal life?

I always had to make a conscience effort to set aside work when I got home. Wasn't as good at that in my earlier years.

 

[JBS]

I am by no means an expert on this. My wife sometimes feel I bring too much home.

I will say a couple of drinks does help take the edge off. I try and not dwell on things I cannot change. Think about the good things in your life. If your wife all of a sudden was hurt or sick would this other stuff matter? Probably not much.

Keep moving forward. If necessary start working on a plan to get out. You are a young guy in a huge industry. Many opportunities are available to you.

I will leave you with my favorite saying.

Nothing too good or too bad last forever.

 

[monkeyswrench]

I think everyone's stress is slightly different. Last week there was a thread dealing with work mistakes...some guys here deal with numbers that are purely theoretical for some of us. It's what they are used to. There are some here who may worry about having gas money to get to work, or food for the kids. No one would admit it, but that's life. Stress can do worse than kill you. It can effect your life and relationships...kids, wife, parents and sibilings. If you don't vent, you'll explode. Some form of working out helped me...yardwork or chopping firewood.
When the economy tanked, work and money was a major stressor. My Mom's health was failing, and I was watching cancer take her. My wife was an absolute saint, and I was an absolute timebomb. Short tempered and wound tight. Try to find an outlet, a way to purge. Hopefully things get better at your job. You only live once. Priorities are what you make them.

 

[Gelcoater]

Bourbon, and lots of it.

I smoke pot

 

[Riverfamlee]

Plan more river trips. Gives me a chance to re-boot. Parker is even better for this because the cell service is shit. You have no choice but to disconnect.

 

[attitude]

I smoke pot

All us picky assholes really stress you out huh?

 

[Slats]

I deal with stress at work a bit also. My wife has been by my side anytime I need to vent. I talk it out with her a bit and then move on from the conversation. We then talk about the dogs or whatever. If you dwell on it to long at home you never get away from it coming home with you.
You care so you stress. Just try to keep a calm attitude and don’t take it out on her.
Good luck with it.
Ps. Have a cold beer or what ever you prefer.

 

[crzy2bealive]

I don't talk about work, leave work at work..

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

 

[COCA COLA COWBOY]

I take it out on my wife! Seriously, it's horrible, but I married a good woman that deals with my bullshit.

Stress, it's everyday! I literally planned my calendar and went to the river with the plan of staying until Monday.... Worked half the day on the computer at the river and came back Sunday early for work. The market is good at the moment and I'm just living cheap with the plan that I will have time off during the recession.

The only thing that truly helps me with stress is shutting the phone off when my son is playing soccer. Walking away from the phone for at least an hour when my wife and I are home from work. My plan is to get back in the gym as that is known to help.

 

[ChumpChange]

When I worked the other direction, I would swing by Hub Cap Annie's on the way home and drop all the stress on @PVHCA

 

[HB2Havasu]

I was told as a 19 year old by my first Manager. Don’t bring you work home, and don’t bring your home to work. I try to do this daily. (Not always successful, lol).

In the immortal words of former Dodger, Wille 3 Dog Davis talking to a reporter after striking out 3 times during a World Series game: If it ain’t my wife, and it ain’t my life, then who gives a fuck?
Seriously it pretty much comes down to it as simple as this! Find another job if it’s ruining your home life and/or marriage. It’s not worth it!!!!

 

[ltbaney1]

i go to the gym or batting cages or something physical. get it out.

 

[RandyH]

I try to pedal about 150 to 200 miles a week so that others on this board can honk and yell at me along the road.

 

[Bear Down]

I also struggle with this, problem is with my industry, there is no off button, its somewhat a 24hr business so I have to be available all the time. A good day can go to shit at 6 p.m. if I get a certain call. Mid week drinking did help (1 or 2 drinks on a Wed or Th), but I felt crummy drinking in front of my kid just for the heck of it. Gym helps a lot, but my good mood can become very grumpy in a hot second if something simple in the house triggers me, so I try to keep busy at home and either work on the house or a project and tire myself out, but that gets me into hot water because I am not hanging out with the family. I am not sure of a good solution, as I don't have one to follow myself. Only thing that is consistent and helps a bit is to play with the kids....with the goal of tiring them out. stomping on a 4 and 10 year old does wonders for a 44 year old..

 

[Chevy5150]

MACALLAN

 

[Xtrmwakeboarder]

Clock out...leave it at work....that easy ..why stress over things you have no control over? Well if you're fucking up.....you just better suck it up buttercup.....go to the gym or buy a set of drums...

Kind of agree with this. Work belongs at work, and home belongs at home. I deal with a little bit of the crossover by working out. I built a gym in my garage so I wouldn’t have an excuse not to go.

 

[Bpracing1127]

I smoke pot

This!!!! Lol

I try not to bring home work that still has to be done. If I am staying late. I make the most of it and get it all done so it’s not a normal thing. My wife and I are both up for promotions so we having been putting in the extra effort to get there. The person suffering is our son. But when we are home we make the most of it too. Stress is part of life. Some people deal with it differently then others. River is my de stresser, shoot guns that helps a lot!

 

[Bpracing1127]

Also with technology work is now a 24/7 job. Our parents did the work of one and only m-f 12 hours a day. We do the work of 3 and 24/7 due to technology

 

[RodnJen]

 

[Waterjunky]

All the mention of booze here is double edged. For occasional issues it is all right but if it becomes the norm.... you really need to deal with it other ways.
This is one of the reasons I work for the state. I had a super crazy 24/7 job for awhile and decided that it was not the best lifestyle. I got sick of the 90+ hours on an average week with others going much higher. One of the few perks of working for the state is I do my time and leave it all at work. Now saying that, it is more realistically 45 hours a week with occasional 14+ hour days but you get the point. If work is spinning out of control, change something there or you will unfortunately change it elsewhere in your life such as a divorce and/or kids who fear you. Drinking is a fine occasional solution, I use it myself, change is the only real method. What is causing the stress at work? What can you do about it? Think outside the box a little on this. It also might dictate looking elsewhere for work.

 

[River Runnin]

We are going through some changes at work and the stress has just been ramped up 10 fold over the last month. I do my best to compartmentalize my life so my wife doesn't bear the brunt of it but over the last week or so she has been starting to notice my stress.

Those of you who work in much more stressful jobs than me, do you have any tips on not bringing that stress home to affect the personal life?

Leave the AR in the Safe!!

 

[Tooms22]

This is the price you pay I think when you're one of the people that takes ownership and gives a shit about what you do.

This.

If your job is stressful, I sure as hell hope you're getting paid for it.

I started my business about a year ago. The major start up cost was school loans but the operating costs (no employees and virtual office) are low. So I don't tend to stress as much as my wife.

My wife works at sizable firm in Irvine and has billable hours to meet. She's making the money and has the stress to go along with it. She works on every drive to and from the lake. She works at night and on the weekends.

I think it's teamwork. If my work ramps up one week, she'll give me support. If she's getting swamped (which is regularly), I make dinner and take care of any non-work tasks she can't get to. I don't think you have to leave the stress at work but you don't want to overload your spouse either. It's a give and take at my house.

Oh, and we've been redoing the backyard the last few months. You'll forget everything if after work you get home and return to the 40 foot fan palm removal project because you were too cheap to pay some guy $850 to rip it out. Pick axe, saw, etc. will put you to bed early

 

[footer]

I probably talk to my wife about work twice a year, max. And I try to keep about the good stuff. But I have a couple friends that I talk work with every week, and vice versa. We're in completely separate industries, and the differences in perspective are enlightening.

And exercise definitly helps. When my body is near max effort my brain is forced to drop the BS. I'm not talking about a walk around the block. I'm talking high heart rate, every pore sweating, almost tunnel vision shit. When the exercise is over, and I return to thinking about work, the issues often feel like less of a big deal. They're not gone, but they're not going to kill me.

Annnd, I drink

 

[RiverDave]

We are going through some changes at work and the stress has just been ramped up 10 fold over the last month. I do my best to compartmentalize my life so my wife doesn't bear the brunt of it but over the last week or so she has been starting to notice my stress.

Those of you who work in much more stressful jobs than me, do you have any tips on not bringing that stress home to affect the personal life?

What is the problem that is stressing you out? Maybe solve that problem and then less stress?

 

[Cole Trickle]

I worked a very competitive sales job as a producer for a couple years. Long days and had to work every other Saturday.

I hated it and absolutely brought it home with me. Wife and I eventually had a sit down and we agreed I should move on because money isn't worth more than happiness.

I absolutely have left some $$$ on the table career wise but have zero regrets and enjoy spending as much time with the wife and kid as i can....If you need to drink daily to help you cope with work I would say it's time to find a new job.

 

[ChumpChange]

MACALLAN

Look who showed up to the party!

 

[JD D05]

I worked a very competitive sales job as a producer for a couple years. Long days and had to work every other Saturday.

I hated it and absolutely brought it home with me. Wife and I eventually had a sit down and we agreed I should move on because money isn't worth more than happiness.

I absolutely have left some $$$ on the table career wise but have zero regrets and enjoy spending as much time with the wife and kid as i can....If you need to drink daily to help you cope with work I would say it's time to find a new job.

Such a bitch.

 

[Cole Trickle]

Such a bitch.

Happy Bitch to you sir!!

 

[HALLETT BOY]

1 word : Ativan

 

[rivermobster]

Shop Foreman for Lexus in Glendale...

EVERY Friday night I had a standing appointment with a masseuse. Not only was it great to get a massage, but the girl that did me was kinna hot. and a friend of a friend.

No matter how bad it got at work, I would just think about Friday night and that hour I was gonna have being worked over with soft music and a hot chicks hands all over me....

I was a happy camper, and set for the weekend after my appointment with her!!!

 

[JD D05]

Happy Bitch to you sir!!

Hahaha you are a happy guy.

 

[WhatExit?]

Shop Foreman for Lexus in Glendale...

EVERY Friday night I had a standing appointment with a masseuse. Not only was it great to get a massage, but the girl that did me was kinna hot. and a friend of a friend.

No matter how bad it got at work, I would just think about Friday night and that hour I was gonna have being worked over with soft music and a hot chicks hands all over me....

It was a happy ending, and set for the weekend after my appointment with her!!!

Fixed it for ya

 

[LargeOrangeFont]

Hobbies, and controlling what you can control, and not worrying about what your cant control. I try to turn it off when I'm done with work, but you can't always do that. Taking an hour and working on one of your projects after work in the garage may help.

Talking through some of the stressors at work with your wife may help as well. She may offer a different perspective.

 

[Xring01]

No BS...
My job has alot of Stress... as I have gotten older, it doesnt impact me like it used to...

But on occasion, when it gets really bad, Bourbon gets the job done... if not, I would not sleep that night. Once my mind gets focused on an issue, I get pissed.. when I get pissed, I toss and turn all night... obsess over that issue...

But a Bourbon or three, typically solves that problem..

In addition, I got back into listening to high quality audio files on my Home Theatre/Stereo...
Its amazing how my Heart Rate decrease's when I get to jamming to good tunes...

 

[wet hull]

Ass
Grass
Gym
The wife knows mouthhugs are a great de-stresser, as well

In all seriousness stress tries to kill me. Its the main cause of my Crohns flare ups. Own a buisness as a GC and extremely busy with 100 decisions daily. I do my best to stay relaxed, pre plan for the what ifs and when adversity comes my way I stay honest and communicate with my customers. Nothing more I can do at that point. Tomorrow is always another day.

 

[buck35]

No BS...
My job has alot of Stress... as I have gotten older, it doesnt impact me like it used to...

But on occasion, when it gets really bad, Bourbon gets the job done... if not, I would not sleep that night. Once my mind gets focused on an issue, I get pissed.. when I get pissed, I toss and turn all night... obsess over that issue...

But a Bourbon or three, typically solves that problem..

In addition, I got back into listening to high quality audio files on my Home Theatre/Stereo...
Its amazing how my Heart Rate decrease's when I get to jamming to good tunes...

A bit of white noise at bedtime ,or throughout the night night does wonders to shut off the brain.

 

[Yellowboat]

I use to step on to the mat in either wreslting or judo...handing some one thier was or getting yours handed too you worked for a long time.

Now, i sit in front of the aquarium and feed the fish.

 

[f12517]

I have a friend who is in the same industry and is a business owner too. We talk from time to time, usually when we are driving home. We bitch to each other about the day to day stress of owning and running a business in California

 

[franky]

Kratom, Green Maeng Da. Make a tea with 3 grams...

 

[530RL]

I try to take a relaxing walk on a golf course.

 

[AZMIDLYF]

I have a gym in my garage and usually roll right in after work. Momma knows to leave me to it because the edge usually comes off nicely. I call it sanity maintenance. You just need to figure out your coping mechanism sir.

 

[t&y]

We are going through some changes at work and the stress has just been ramped up 10 fold over the last month. I do my best to compartmentalize my life so my wife doesn't bear the brunt of it but over the last week or so she has been starting to notice my stress.

Those of you who work in much more stressful jobs than me, do you have any tips on not bringing that stress home to affect the personal life?

Interesting subject. Your wife can probably read the stress on your face and you're not fooling her a bit if you just brush it off with a "Okay" in response to how your day was.

I tell my wife a fraction of the shit I deal with, but make it a point to give her a little info so she doesn't feel like she's in the dark. Lawsuits, I usually wait until they are over (been lucky with that so far) and anything else is a case by case basis. If I know it's going to end up on TV I'll just give her a heads up and keep it simple.

It all really comes down to does she understand your job and what you do? If she doesn't understand what you do, telling her about your issues is kind of like speaking a different language. My partners and I bullshit all the time about the intense stuff, but we all understand have dealt with it so there is a mutual understanding there. If you are going to let her in on it, just make sure she understands what it's all about.

Other than that, I either hit the gym or go for a long run, or do a bunch of yard work. Gives me time to clear my head if the 1 1/2 hour drive home didn't already do the trick.

 

[Backlash]

My wife used to work in a stressful situation that was so bad, she was hospitalized. That was a life-changing moment for both of us. When this happened, we knew it was time for a change. She quit and found peace elsewhere and works for people who recognize and appreciate her skillsets.

I learned a great deal of patience during that time. I worked close by and was aware of what her supervisors were intentionally doing to her. I had to restrain myself daily to NOT choke the life out of that fat fuk she worked for.

Once she found solitude with her new employer, I too quit my job and moved elsewhere for a fresh start. It is/was a huge gamble for both of us, but was absolutely necessary for us to maintain any amount of sanity.

 

[Hdgasser]

What is the problem that is stressing you out? Maybe solve that problem and then less stress?

This ^^^

 

[BONER]

Lots of relievers out there. Some people go to the Gym, some people eat, some people drink, some people smoke Grass, some people shoot guns, and I think alot of us play with Motors.

At the end of the day, you have to have something you like to do and want to do on the weekends and or at night so you can unplug and or disconnect. Has to be done, or you'll go Bonkers.

Identifying and eliminating that stress, which has already been mentioned, should always be Step #1.

Good luck Man.