Whats more important, money or work life balance?

[aka619er]

I recently accepted what should be my dream job. Supposed to start Jan 16, 2024 although I keep pushing another 30 days. Still DOD, 100% remote, lots or travel, job super high in demand and even without the remote its needed all over the world.

Here is the debate. I'm paid great at my current job and do a 50% telework schedule. 4-10's schedule so 3 day weekends every week. Get along amazing with my Co workers, Supervisor and Command. And the job is pretty stress free with not a lot of milestones or projects. I may be the only person in history that always wears shorts and flipflops onto a military base during my 50% attendance shaking hands with the brass. I am pigeonholed though so other than regular govt raises there is no place to go. Very limited even with relocating to another military base.

New job takes me back into a tough stressful job series that has a lot of deadlines and generally high turnover. The sky is the limit on promotions and opportunities are all throughout the world. Like mentioned before its 100% remote.

So do you just accept you're happy and comfortable or take the risk for more money with a more stressful life?

 

[Singleton]

I had to make a very similar decision. EVP of Internal Audit for a multinational gaming company or pivot into a new career path leading a team of software sales engineers that focused on compliance software.

After talking with the wife, I left the money and did the pivot. Best decision I made for my family.

 

[DWC]

That’s a really tough one. Best thing i ever did was move out of an office job and back into the field when the kids were young. I got to see 95% of everything they did no matter what time/day. Didn’t take a promotion until the youngest was just about done with HS. Don’t think i would have done it except the spot was open and i really didn’t want to train another boss. I’ve got 4-5 years left now and it’s getting interesting. My new boss is already looking for his replacement. It would be good for retirement but a brutal amount of stress and moving back to the Death Star.
If it’ll make a huge difference in your post work life and it won’t hurt the family I’d give it a shot. If it wrecks your family life i wouldn’t risk it. It’s not worth it to end up with half.

 

[zhandfull]

I’m 54 and working 4-10’s making okay money. Good work life balance for me. Burnt myself out self employed for 18 years. No desire to go back to high stress job for even double the money I make now.

 

[Go-Fly]

Money. Be happy on your own time. Work is what you make it.

 

[CLdrinker]

Money isn’t everything.

In 4-5yrs I may take a step backwards with a good size pay cut do I can move out of CA.

 

[caribbean20]

Take the money. Rest when you are dead.

All kidding aside, retirement can be a long time. It’s better with money.

 

[monkeyswrench]

It depends on family or future plans I think. I left what was good money (a mere pittance by some standards, but huge for a fool) to exit the rat race. Make a little money, but extremely low payables, no debt and a pretty simple life. Three kids under the age of 10 at the time of move. Flash forward 10 or so years: Some unforeseen medical issues have changed the situation entirely. Not just expenses, more in time allowed to do things, be it make money, or partake in recreational activities.
Things change, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. In my personal experience, money can help a lot of things, but not everything. The most difficult things I've dealt with couldn't be changed, rich or poor.

 

[530RL]

My personal experience is that people are who they are.

I have for decades said I need to play more and work less. And then a new opportunity comes along and the play is put aside.

As Popeyes says, I am what I am, and I think that applies to all of us.

Make the choice based upon who you truly are, not who you wish to be. You can’t change who you truly are no matter how hard you try. And you will not be happy trying to be someone you are not.

 

[77charger]

I value time over money. Time can’t be replaced but money can be made.

Last three years I’ve worked less and living better since moved out of ca with house nearly paid off. No I don’t have big savings either but when you die you can’t take it with you.

I work part time now not as stressful and if I died tomorrow wife can easily make payments and have a home. Kids will inherit a house to start from as well.

 

[HTTP404]

Yes.

 

[Sharp Shooter]

That's an easy one for me, take the happy option -> stress will kill you.

 

[4Waters]

Oct 2022 I got promoted to equipment operator, a 40k plus a year raise but in a department that I was unfamiliar with the job and the equipment, but I took it and figured they are going to teach me since nothing in my background nor my interview stated I knew anything about that dept and equipment.

The first 3 months went good and I was taught how to use the equipment for that side of the job. In Jan I was moved to the other side of the job and wasn't taught a damn thing, I was trying to self teach and was fuking things up while dealing with bad daily headaches that was wearing on my family and putting major strain on my marriage. By March I had enough and gave up that promotion and went back to my old position, my wife 100% supported me and came clean that she wasn't sure how our marriage was going to go if I hadn't givin up the new position.

It's a good chance that the new position would have cost me more in the long run than I would have ever made. I'm still able to promote to that position in the future but I know and my employer knows that I can't go to that particular department.

 

[77charger]

That's an easy one for me, take the happy option -> stress will kill you.

Yeh started riding dirt again twice in last month but dam I feel like a beginner and that’s with 46 years of two wheels. but glad I have midweek time to do so. 4hrs on bike this month it took from 2017 to November this year to put 20 on it.

 

[SoCalDave]

Money isn’t everything.

This...

 

[Willie B]

… There is a reason I show only 15 years on the books as being in someone else’s employ…

 

[Flatsix66]

It depends.

 

[Xtrmwakeboarder]

I have no kids and enjoy the DINK lifestyle. We like expensive things and I sure as hell don’t come from money, so I have to make it. I’ll continue to do this until we are comfortable and then retire early. My brain won’t always be this sharp and my body will eventually break down. Even at a desk job. I chose to get it while the getting is good and over insure myself should something catastrophic happen.

 

[LuauLounge]

Go with what you enjoy, assuming it meets your goals, income and family time. Money is not the end all. Personally, had a great gig, 10 years in and new management made it unbearable, so I walked as did most of the group.

 

[Sharp Shooter]

View attachment 1317890
Yeh started riding dirt again twice in last month but dam I feel like a beginner and that’s with 46 years of two wheels. but glad I have midweek time to do so. 4hrs on bike this month it took from 2017 to November this year to put 20 on it. View attachment 1317891

So good for your livelyhood!

 

[DB / HAV]

You can never make up for lost family time …

 

[viperized_jr]

I think it comes down to what you can and can't do. Obviously money is a factor but that comes at a cost. I work for my boss but he knows I'm going to every game my boys play and honestly he is normally there with me.

I think unless the extra money is gonna make a huge change which your whole family feels it's worth it if not just let it go. Time is priceless which you will never get back.

 

[whiteworks]

Why can’t you have both the money and the quality of life? Seems to me that we live in America and you can do whatever you want here and make whatever you want of yourself how you see fit. How a person perceives life and career is on them, however most are terrified to step away from the pellet feeder and roll the dice. No one’s getting out alive, you can’t take it with you, might as well go big and make life how you want before you get dealt a hand you can’t change.

 

[77charger]

So good for your livelyhood!

It’s my new exercise program only prob I see cool stuff and stop. Cut back on ipas too.

 

[Orange Juice]

I’d rather have more money, than work life, while I was young.
It kept me out of trouble, and I could afford what others could not. ( Boats, cars, and two different airplanes).
I jumped on a plane Monday morning at 7 am, and returned home gear down around 4PM Friday, usually worked 65 hour work weeks.

If you’re married, have kids, you don’t have many options while your kids are in the house. You need to be home every night, and helping your kids accelerate in life skills, until they leave the house. During those 20 years, I rarely left town without the entire family in tow.

I went back to traveling in 2019 before COVID-19. I continued to fly out remote for work until 2022, which was about the time flights were returning to “normal”.

What changed? Restaurants are expensive, and the service is not like it was pre-COVID. Hotels are run down and lack maintenance, rental cars are undependable, even with a reservation.
Companies are months, if not years behind with their customers. I can’t get parts. Managers are pressured to send employees on-site without a plan, and confirmed parts are on site. I was spinning my wheels, and managers couldn’t get me parts. They wanted me to spend my weekends flying back to sites.

I suggest you ask for $180k+
I was pulling down $172k when I left in 2022.

 

[Dalton]

You say all around the world, sorry if I missed it, but are you married? I've been overseas for 8 years now, not many marriages last, unless your wife comes with you, I'm single so it works for me. How often would you be overseas?

 

[Jimmy]

Like mentioned before its 100% remote.

So do you just accept you're happy and comfortable or take the risk for more money with a more stressful life?

If ya single go for it, if married maybe, if kids not a chance.

I've just taken a 4-3 roster like what you've got purely to be home more.
This will be the first normal job I've had in 12 years.

It is a pay cut but I'm not working the stupid hours...

 

[CarolynandBob]

If you are happy now then stay where you are. Life is too short to be stressed and unhappy.

 

[17 10 Flat]

To me it depends are where you are in your life. When I first started at Ford, Newley married I worked 7 days a week constantly for about 3 years. Even after having children missed some things.
Later on money not quite as important. I turned down 2 promotions because I loved my job and worked with a great bunch of people.

Looking back spending more family time may have been the way to go. All the OT definitely got us a head start though. Paid cash for everything even vehicles, only exception was our house.

 

[framer1]

Nobody ever laid on their death bed and said I wish I would of worked more. But that being said I used to work seven days a week 10 hrs a day for years, when I was starting my framing business.

 

[Xtrmwakeboarder]

Nobody ever laid on their death bed and said I wish I would of worked more. But that being said I used to work seven days a week 10 hrs a day for years, when I was starting my framing business.

Probably not, but I bet some said I wish I would have made more money to set my family up better… maybe made more money so they could have traveled more, experienced more. Etc. Money doesn’t just buy stuff, it unlocks experiences.

Pops had to work to buy the boat and afford those river trips for us. He could have kept surfing and working odd jobs, but he decided he wanted more for us. As his life comes to a close, I bet he’ll say those memories he created by working 80 hrs for periods at a time were worth it.

 

[bowtiejunkie]

Depends on whether the salary bump is worth the added stress plus time burden compared to current position, what your career goals are, and if you're married with kids. I used to travel quite a bit, now 100% remote. The latter is getting really old 4 years running now.

I'd say do what works for your family.

 

[Go-Fly]

Hey look, work is the biggest part of your life. Everything and I mean everything pivots around your income. Most people work the job that they fall into or happen upon. There is always a way to work and spend time with family. When you pigeon hole yourself, you ask the question you dont want the answers to.

 

[Mikes56]

I think it would matter how old you are. If you’re somewhat young and can handle the stress and BS, then take the higher paying job. If you’re older I’d stay where you’re comfortable. As you age, little health problems will show up making it harder to deal with issues at work. Those health problems don’t go away or get better on their own, they just get worse as you age.

 

[Nanu/Nanu]

Its a tough decision as i have no idea what your family or financial situation truly is. Me and my wife have chosen careers where if we want to work more the opportunity is always there, but we didn't want to be slaves to our employer. To do this our toys are older and do require or have required a bit more elbow grease to keep using. However, we dont have payments on them. We burn up every hour of PTO i have on vacations every year. Yeah i may not have money in the bank but i only have 12 years left with my youngest kid. I can't buy memories and life experiences for them... So theres that

So we chose to have balance between money and family, because we feel both are needed. Hope this helps in your decision making and that you're able to include your whole family in the matter.

 

[farmo83]

I was recently in this position. I had a pretty cush well paying gig with little to no stress and a great boss.

I took a chance and moved into a much more stressful role that will hopefully lead to much more lucrative stuff down the road.

In my situation I felt I was getting dull.and want to keep my skills sharp. Also a great situation is one manager change away from a hell hole. I could have waited for my boss to retire in 5 ish years but to me that was very risky to put all my eggs in that basket.

My mom passed up a promotion in the name of work life balance. Later on she ended up doing the managers work anyway, she said she should have just taken the money.

 

[Cdog]

Just depends where you’re at. Sometimes you’re on the go, other times you’re cruising. If it’s the same all the time you’re not making the most of your short time here on earth

 

[PaPaG]

Lots of good advice in this post that include both sides. Some work most of their lives and miss living it because of the amount of time spent on working, some keep working to get an end result and set themselves and or their family up for life, some work to have a care free life or as care free as you can realistically get. Some are happy some are not. It all depends on where you are in life and where you want to be be later in life, if you are young, maybe have a family and want to be financially set for life I say take the higher paying job with room advance and make even more money, then once you reach specific SET goals $$ wise you cut back and do something with a lot less stress and more free time. IT all depends on YOU, Family, Kids, ETC. on what you do and which direction you should go.

 

[pixrthis]

For me it’s always been life balance. At 27 I went on location for work and when I got home my one year old son didn’t know who I was, that’s when I took a different career path.

 

[Morehart]

I recently accepted what should be my dream job. Supposed to start Jan 16, 2024 although I keep pushing another 30 days. Still DOD, 100% remote, lots or travel, job super high in demand and even without the remote its needed all over the world.

Here is the debate. I'm paid great at my current job and do a 50% telework schedule. 4-10's schedule so 3 day weekends every week. Get along amazing with my Co workers, Supervisor and Command. And the job is pretty stress free with not a lot of milestones or projects. I may be the only person in history that always wears shorts and flipflops onto a military base during my 50% attendance shaking hands with the brass. I am pigeonholed though so other than regular govt raises there is no place to go. Very limited even with relocating to another military base.

New job takes me back into a tough stressful job series that has a lot of deadlines and generally high turnover. The sky is the limit on promotions and opportunities are all throughout the world. Like mentioned before its 100% remote.

So do you just accept you're happy and comfortable or take the risk for more money with a more stressful life?

It's easy to be comfortable, and it sounds like you are. That's a good place to be. Adjusting to a new position or career is not and could weigh in heavy on your family and friends for a $. Money is not everything. It helps buy happiness and stress. If the job won't offer less work for more pay, look at your position on how much you have to sacrifice. Always ask for more where you are at, it never hurts to ask. I've made a move recently within my company that is for the same money less work and more time with my family. Best adjacent move I've made.

 

[monkeyswrench]

For the first time ever, I'm going to have to disagree with @Go-Fly

Not "everything" pivots around income. Sure, it may make some things easier, and open doors...but it is not the end all, be all. On a summer day in 2007, I chose not to work, and took Pops fishing. First day off I'd taken in months. First time I'd fished with him in years. He suffered a massive heart attack a few weeks later.

When Mom was fighting cancer, I cut back to 10 hours a day working. Spent lots of time taking her places, as well as raising my kids. Missed a lot of $, when she got bad near the end.

Sitting with my kid in a thousand doctor's appointments, or at bedside in a hospital, never thought to myself once that "if I had more money it would fix this"

Everyone's situation is different. In mine, I've noticed money can't buy time, nor can it by health. We all eventually run out of both.

 

[lbhsbz]

Trick question.

I struggled financially for the first 25 of so years of my career…making it, but just barely. Nothing in the bank really, $3000 cars, POS boat and used my parent’s trailer at the river when I had the gas money…small house in a meh part of town. It’s stressful living like that.

I had an opportunity to start a business a few years ago and while it’s a shit ton of work and the future is still uncertain…I’m a lot happier. Momma and the boy can travel and do a lot more stuff (without me lol) but it’s my job to make sure they’re taken care of…that’s always been first in my book.

As usual, I didn’t fully understand what I was getting into and had no idea if the business would even work. I’ve deviated from the original plan considerably to make the best I can of the rapidly changing market, and found myself doing about 90% retail where I can’t just shut it off for week and go someplace. Hopefully I’ll get to a point this year or next where I can hire someone and start doing more fun stuff, but who knows where things will go.

Everyone can survive without fun and family…nobody can survive without money.

I feel like shit a lot of times for prioritizing things that way…and catch a lotta shit, but then I ask the wife if she’s ever had to put groceries back at the checkout because there wasn’t enough money or if she‘s rather our kid go to public schools (in Long Beach) than the $10K/year private school he’s been in since kindergarten…no is the answer….so I smile and get back work.

Also, when that single mom is ahead of me in line counting her change to see what needs to get put back which a young kid in the other arm and that look of despair on her face…I hand the cashier a $100 bill, instruct her to give the change to the lady, smile and go about my day.

At the end of the day, I’m able to provide a roof over my family’s head, a warm place for everyone to sleep, plenty of food, reliable cars, and the ability for them to pretty much do whatever the fuck they want. Not everyone has that. So I might be a bit of asshole for doing things the way I do….could be worse.

Looking back, there are lots of things I would have done differently…but I can’t change the past. I’d rather have the family talking shit about me while flying around the country visiting people and having fun than talking shit to me because I was too inept to be able to afford those luxuries.

At least I’m not stuck driving a Ford.

 

[FlyByWire]

As someone who’s missed damn near every one of my kids’ Christmas mornings (or held them on days other than Christmas), baseball games, school events etc.. and spent near every Thanksgiving / 4th of July / New Years etc for the last 15 years, alone and at work.. I can say that for me, I’d take a better work-life balance over money any day of the week.. I do well for myself I suppose, but I’ll never get the missed time back with my kids.

I’ve always said if I could make the same amount of money with my level of education doing something else, I’d leave in a heartbeat.

 

[4Waters]

If ya single go for it, if married maybe, if kids not a chance.

I've just taken a 4-3 roster like what you've got purely to be home more.
This will be the first normal job I've had in 12 years.

It is a pay cut but I'm not working the stupid hours...

How are you buddy, glad to see you again. Hope all is going well with the family, how's the boat running

 

[17 10 Flat]

For the first time ever, I'm going to have to disagree with @Go-Fly

Not "everything" pivots around income. Sure, it may make some things easier, and open doors...but it is not the end all, be all. On a summer day in 2007, I chose not to work, and took Pops fishing. First day off I'd taken in months. First time I'd fished with him in years. He suffered a massive heart attack a few weeks later.

When Mom was fighting cancer, I cut back to 10 hours a day working. Spent lots of time taking her places, as well as raising my kids. Missed a lot of $, when she got bad near the end.

Sitting with my kid in a thousand doctor's appointments, or at bedside in a hospital, never thought to myself once that "if I had more money it would fix this"

Everyone's situation is different. In mine, I've noticed money can't buy time, nor can it by health. We all eventually run out of both.

Amen !!

 

[Cdog]

To all and OP. I have a tradition on my New Year’s Eve I’ve done the last couple years.

I load up my audible with a minimum of 3 books to listen/read to kick off the year.

I’ll listen while I work on the race car in the garage or driving to freakin Buttonwillow for 9 hours.

It’s about perspective & expanding the way you see & interact with the world. I’ve learned to let go of things I can’t change and look at my time on this earth alive as a resource to squeeze as much as I can out of it.

A body and mind in motion stays in motion. Carpe diem

Cheers!

 

[Go-Fly]

For the first time ever, I'm going to have to disagree with @Go-Fly

Not "everything" pivots around income. Sure, it may make some things easier, and open doors...but it is not the end all, be all. On a summer day in 2007, I chose not to work, and took Pops fishing. First day off I'd taken in months. First time I'd fished with him in years. He suffered a massive heart attack a few weeks later.

When Mom was fighting cancer, I cut back to 10 hours a day working. Spent lots of time taking her places, as well as raising my kids. Missed a lot of $, when she got bad near the end.

Sitting with my kid in a thousand doctor's appointments, or at bedside in a hospital, never thought to myself once that "if I had more money it would fix this"

Everyone's situation is different. In mine, I've noticed money can't buy time, nor can it by health. We all eventually run out of both.

The family is all true. Still you had to give up income in order to spend time with family. For you it was money well spent.

 

[Sportin' Wood]

I recently accepted what should be my dream job. Supposed to start Jan 16, 2024 although I keep pushing another 30 days. Still DOD, 100% remote, lots or travel, job super high in demand and even without the remote its needed all over the world.

Here is the debate. I'm paid great at my current job and do a 50% telework schedule. 4-10's schedule so 3 day weekends every week. Get along amazing with my Co workers, Supervisor and Command. And the job is pretty stress free with not a lot of milestones or projects. I may be the only person in history that always wears shorts and flipflops onto a military base during my 50% attendance shaking hands with the brass. I am pigeonholed though so other than regular govt raises there is no place to go. Very limited even with relocating to another military base.

New job takes me back into a tough stressful job series that has a lot of deadlines and generally high turnover. The sky is the limit on promotions and opportunities are all throughout the world. Like mentioned before its 100% remote.

So do you just accept you're happy and comfortable or take the risk for more money with a more stressful life?

Age, marriage status, relationship, and children would greatly influence my career path choice.


I think I would go after the challenge.

 

[Smupser]

Everyones situation is different and I struggle with this everyday. I think you have to find the balance between the two for your own circumstances and goals.

you’ll get the people who will say money allows freedom and nice things to let you enjoy life and you’ll get those who say money isn’t everything. my biggest thing has always been making enough money to not only allow my family to live a comfortable life but also make constant progression towards long term financial goals.

another consideration for me personally is my ability to continue to make good money when others are struggling to make ends meet, it is something I don’t take for granted and I try to always maintain the “take it while it’s there“ mentality.

my kids are getting to an age that I really want to start spending more time with them and help them develop and grow, so I’m really hoping by the end of 24’ to really start making that happening and be at home more rather than trying to always grind

 

[rivermobster]

I recently accepted what should be my dream job. Supposed to start Jan 16, 2024 although I keep pushing another 30 days. Still DOD, 100% remote, lots or travel, job super high in demand and even without the remote its needed all over the world.

Here is the debate. I'm paid great at my current job and do a 50% telework schedule. 4-10's schedule so 3 day weekends every week. Get along amazing with my Co workers, Supervisor and Command. And the job is pretty stress free with not a lot of milestones or projects. I may be the only person in history that always wears shorts and flipflops onto a military base during my 50% attendance shaking hands with the brass. I am pigeonholed though so other than regular govt raises there is no place to go. Very limited even with relocating to another military base.

New job takes me back into a tough stressful job series that has a lot of deadlines and generally high turnover. The sky is the limit on promotions and opportunities are all throughout the world. Like mentioned before its 100% remote.

So do you just accept you're happy and comfortable or take the risk for more money with a more stressful life?

How old are you?

Which job has the best retirement benefits/options?

Which job has the health insurance You prefer?