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7th grade bullying?

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COCA COLA COWBOY

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Does this stuff happen in private school? Just curious.

A lot of the responses are from California folk, how are other states? I'm planning on moving to Texas and know bulling will be there too, but curious if it's as prevalent.

You notice for sure, the bully's are always poor.
 

Mandelon

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80s Glam Metalcast on Twitter: @deesnider @995wkdq We must ...
 

Xtrmwakeboarder

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Does this stuff happen in private school? Just curious.

A lot of the responses are from California folk, how are other states? I'm planning on moving to Texas and know bulling will be there too, but curious if it's as prevalent.

You notice for sure, the bully's are always poor.
Yes, it happens in private schools. Kids this age are just assholes... possibly even more if they are entitled and have rich parents. "I went to private school from 3 months old-8th grade. Huge price break as both my parents worked for the church, or else we wouldn't have been close to affording that tuition."
 

HBCraig

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The over all common concept to deal with bullying that everyone keeps bringing up is as old as time itself. It transcends all races, genders, timelines, species, and possibly aliens as well. At some point, you have to decide if you want to live this way or not. Regardless of the outcome, it has to come from within the individual on their own terms or time line. If you remove them from the situation, they never learn that most valuable lesson, and it can quite possible come back in any of a number of ways down the line. Not only do I share similar stories myself of getting bullied, my kids, like everyone else’s kids did too. My son has Tourette’s syndrome, and it came on in junior high fairly severely, both verbal and physical ticks. As all of you know, the school does jack shit about it, and if he was to tattle, the retaliation is so much worse. Of course the other option was removing him from school. At one point he’d had enough, and decked a kid in the middle of math class. Ironically enough, his math teacher had Tourette’s as well, as saw the whole thing play out. He couldn’t have been more proud of my son, and went to bat for him with the principal, and the bully Was suspended for it! He got a rep from then on for being the shoot first ask questions later kid when it came to his affliction.
Similar fight for my son as I mentioned before. We showed the VP the threatening texts that were sent. The shitbag kid swung at my son and my son then dropped him with a right hand to the chin. The VP called and told me my son was going to be suspended and I told her no. She couldn't belive my denial and said "well, he was involved in a fight and we suspend both parties "
I told her he will be going to school and asked if that was all. She was and is a bleeding heart liberal and we didn't see eye to eye on anything. She hated me and my son but finally realized it was best to ignore me.
I told her she had ample notice to intervene and chose to do nothing so it was solely on her to stop it but she didn't. She could request my son being suspended but I will choose to deny her request
 
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chadzilla

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Timing is interesting. Last night my wife came to me and informed me that our son is being teased at school. She didn't use the term bullying as we both feel they are different. Two kids have been taking his hat, calling him names, telling him he is weak because he plays soccer etc. Little info on our son. He is in 8th grade, extremely smart and loved by all of his teachers. Outgoing, gets along with almost anyone. He is also 6'1", very athletic and strong as hell but skinny like 140lbs soaking wet skinny. These 2 kids teased him in class to the point that he got up and moved away from them so he could get his class work done in one of the three classes he has with them. He asked them numerous times to stop which they did not. 3rd class he has with them, one of the kids grabs his hat and throws it. He turns around, grabs the kid and pins him up against the wall and grabs him by the throat. Tells the kid if he does it again, he's going to get strangled, lets him go and walks off. The wife thinks he took it too far. I say no because the kid has not so much as looked at him since. The class was P.E. so I don't think the teacher saw it. None of the teachers have said anything yet and I'm just waiting for it. Yea maybe he shouldn't have grabbed the kid by the throat, but it got the point across. What i thought about this am on my way to work is this and this is a complete "what if" situation but also complete reality. What if that kid continued his teasing/bullying and he bullied the wrong kid who went home and put a gun to his mouth or hung himself? Maybe my sons' actions made him choose not to bully the one child who really can't take it? I have less than zero tolerance for teasing or bullying and have instructed him to first tell a teacher or someone of authority, and if that doesn't work, do whatever is necessary. If that means throwing the first punch so, be it. In my opinion, the kid doing the bullying is the aggressor and whatever comes after that is self-defense. I wish that all children were as strong mentally as our son but they are not. I have also let him know that standing up for those who are weaker, whether it be mentally or physically, is one of the most noble things a human can do. So, I ask that all of us on here that have kids that are stronger or have influence on others to stand up and defend those in need. It literally might save a life.
 

nordictom

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Does this stuff happen in private school? Just curious.

A lot of the responses are from California folk, how are other states? I'm planning on moving to Texas and know bulling will be there too, but curious if it's as prevalent.

You notice for sure, the bully's are always poor.
yes it does. I think catholic schools are the worst. They preach one thing, but if a certain kids parents "donate" a lot of time & money their respective kids get special treatment.
 

angiebaby

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Another vote for martial arts. Our daughter was bullied a bit and our son is a super sweet person who probably would have been at some point. Our friends were very involved in a local traditional Karate dojo and had a son the same age as ours. We finally put him into classes and after one month, daughter decided she wanted to join also. Our friends ended up branching off their own dojo and our kids both earned black belts under him. The confidence it gave them both is immeasurable. Our daughter went on to instruct at the high school she taught at and led self-defense courses at her sorority. We know of at least one teenager who was able to fend off a potential kidnapper based on the skills our daughter taught her.

I have also witnessed a handful of middle schoolers who were somewhat timid gain a ton of self-confidence with martial arts. I'm partial to a traditional single curriculum (karate, jiu-jitsu) over general martial arts (jack of all trades approach) but that's just my bias. All of it is beneficial on some level. I would also avoid schools that participate in competitions, at least in the beginning.

After 15 years of teaching middle school, I've learned that kids can be assholes, for sure.
 
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angiebaby

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Timing is interesting. Last night my wife came to me and informed me that our son is being teased at school. She didn't use the term bullying as we both feel they are different. Two kids have been taking his hat, calling him names, telling him he is weak because he plays soccer etc. Little info on our son. He is in 8th grade, extremely smart and loved by all of his teachers. Outgoing, gets along with almost anyone. He is also 6'1", very athletic and strong as hell but skinny like 140lbs soaking wet skinny. These 2 kids teased him in class to the point that he got up and moved away from them so he could get his class work done in one of the three classes he has with them. He asked them numerous times to stop which they did not. 3rd class he has with them, one of the kids grabs his hat and throws it. He turns around, grabs the kid and pins him up against the wall and grabs him by the throat. Tells the kid if he does it again, he's going to get strangled, lets him go and walks off. The wife thinks he took it too far. I say no because the kid has not so much as looked at him since. The class was P.E. so I don't think the teacher saw it. None of the teachers have said anything yet and I'm just waiting for it. Yea maybe he shouldn't have grabbed the kid by the throat, but it got the point across. What i thought about this am on my way to work is this and this is a complete "what if" situation but also complete reality. What if that kid continued his teasing/bullying and he bullied the wrong kid who went home and put a gun to his mouth or hung himself? Maybe my sons' actions made him choose not to bully the one child who really can't take it? I have less than zero tolerance for teasing or bullying and have instructed him to first tell a teacher or someone of authority, and if that doesn't work, do whatever is necessary. If that means throwing the first punch so, be it. In my opinion, the kid doing the bullying is the aggressor and whatever comes after that is self-defense. I wish that all children were as strong mentally as our son but they are not. I have also let him know that standing up for those who are weaker, whether it be mentally or physically, is one of the most noble things a human can do. So, I ask that all of us on here that have kids that are stronger or have influence on others to stand up and defend those in need. It literally might save a life.

I feel this is an example of bullying, not teasing. Teasing is playful and usually done by friends. I'm so glad your son took this action. Good for him.
 

4Waters

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Lots of great advice and stories. Appreciate it.
Right now. He's not a fighter. At all. I was surprised when he came home so pissed off saying he wanted to punch fools.
Kid spent most the entire day today building a Lego helicopter and scene deal for a still motion picture project for his digital design class. Checks his grades daily online. He's that kid and im suoer proud of that. His closest 2 friends don't even go to the same school as him so that makes things tough to.
He's real thin and pretty uncoordinated right now. He and his sister have celiac and are both growth hormone deficit. They are catching up quickly but have always been the little ones. Both have been teased/bullied before.
I've tried some classes but they just weren't into it. I'll try something different. Not alot to choose from in my area though.
I need to work on his confidence and show him a few street fighting/boxing things I can. As said here in other posts, self confidence is key to not getting jacked with.
Him and his sister both said they want to try pushing some weights around.
Celiac sucks! I understand the problems it creates, my wife has Celiac and when she gets cross contaminated her guts go to shit literally but it is far and few between and she is moderately sensitive to gluten so we are able to go out to eat to certain restaurants that have a good understanding of food prep for Celiac.

Best of luck to your son and his bully issue, sounds like you have a good handle on this dad thing and are very open and supportive for him.
 

4Waters

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Timing is interesting. Last night my wife came to me and informed me that our son is being teased at school. She didn't use the term bullying as we both feel they are different. Two kids have been taking his hat, calling him names, telling him he is weak because he plays soccer etc. Little info on our son. He is in 8th grade, extremely smart and loved by all of his teachers. Outgoing, gets along with almost anyone. He is also 6'1", very athletic and strong as hell but skinny like 140lbs soaking wet skinny. These 2 kids teased him in class to the point that he got up and moved away from them so he could get his class work done in one of the three classes he has with them. He asked them numerous times to stop which they did not. 3rd class he has with them, one of the kids grabs his hat and throws it. He turns around, grabs the kid and pins him up against the wall and grabs him by the throat. Tells the kid if he does it again, he's going to get strangled, lets him go and walks off. The wife thinks he took it too far. I say no because the kid has not so much as looked at him since. The class was P.E. so I don't think the teacher saw it. None of the teachers have said anything yet and I'm just waiting for it. Yea maybe he shouldn't have grabbed the kid by the throat, but it got the point across. What i thought about this am on my way to work is this and this is a complete "what if" situation but also complete reality. What if that kid continued his teasing/bullying and he bullied the wrong kid who went home and put a gun to his mouth or hung himself? Maybe my sons' actions made him choose not to bully the one child who really can't take it? I have less than zero tolerance for teasing or bullying and have instructed him to first tell a teacher or someone of authority, and if that doesn't work, do whatever is necessary. If that means throwing the first punch so, be it. In my opinion, the kid doing the bullying is the aggressor and whatever comes after that is self-defense. I wish that all children were as strong mentally as our son but they are not. I have also let him know that standing up for those who are weaker, whether it be mentally or physically, is one of the most noble things a human can do. So, I ask that all of us on here that have kids that are stronger or have influence on others to stand up and defend those in need. It literally might save a life.
He handled it correctly, good for him. Confidence is oozing from him
 

angiebaby

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In today's world, a kid will likely get expelled from school, and, if he happens to knock out a tooth, or damage an eye socket, there will possibly be a law suit. Today's world sucks, in these respects, but in my opinion, these things potentially happening, are worth the risk, as opposed to allowing the bullying to continue, for both the physical and mental bruises.
If the "guick course" self defense just really doesn't work with your son, asking around, about the older student, ball player, etc., and offer a payment plan for a determined time frame might be a good plan B.
I think the idea of inviting the bully over, or finding common interests, etc., is a great idea, but likely a fantasy. Remembering back at these derelict bullys in my day, seems like your son wouldn't even be able to communicate with them, as in, he could ask the bully about rc cars, video games, etc., in a safe area, like during class, but likely the bully, especially if any of his cohorts are in class, would likely mimick, make fun, and just verbally bully your son, until class is over and he can physically bully him again.
Going back to the potential lawsuit, wouldn't hurt to check with your insurance guy concerning your liability coverage? Small chance of this ever being an issue, but good to check coverage.
No one gets expelled anymore. You have to go to jail/juvenile hall to be removed from school. After your time there, you go back to public school. Thanks to GW Bush, everyone deserves the right to equal education. If a district does not offer an alternative program (with transportation), they must be returned to the regular ed classroom. I have said it before, the ONLY way that will change is when parents start suing the school district because their child is being denied an education due to the constant disruptions from those students. I would say that most of the disruptors have some sort of handicap or learning disability. That means that currently, they have more rights than mainstream students. That will not change without a court case. Ask your kids if this is occurring. The kids probably won't come out and tell you because they think it is normal.
 
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Fast Willy

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Ill never forget 6th grade . Just started middle school & was 6ft white boy . Bunch of inner city hood rats got bused there & they thought i was a good target to pick on. I told my dad what was going on & the best advice he gave paid off greatly. He said when the person comes up to you, punch that fucker as hard as you can & dont stop beating him till teachers pull you off him. Needless to say first punch i threw basically knocked him out & the others thrown were just a bonus beat down. Told his boys as I was getting pulled off I would fuck them up the same way. Never had a issue again with none of them. Dont wait for them to throw the first punch!!!
 

nordictom

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Our Daughter went to Kenpo Karate at Bob White's studio in Costa Mesa. not sure about now but when she went there, it wasn't for the faint of heart. I don't think a Spec Force guy would f with these people. profession ass kickers, but very quiet about it.

 
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Cole Trickle

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Kids are so bizarre. I think it's the human race where you have to test the weak.

I can remember in 7th grade I started a new school that was 6-8. I was behind the 8 ball as kids already had a click after the first year of being together. Couple weeks in a big fat mexican kid named Joey charged me in PE and I front kicked him in the face and knocked him to the ground and bodied up his face. What Joey didn't know is yes I was skinny but I had been doing Taekwondo for quite a few years. Never had an issue at the school again and I'm actually still friends with Joey and his brother today.

My kid for one reason or another has never had a single issue. People flock to him and he could careless it's weird...lol

We have had the talk that I would whoop his ass if i ever find he has bullied a kid but i have no problem if he defends himself or steps in to protect a kid that needs help. Couple years back we get a call from the school and they want to give him and his friend an award because a group of kids were gonna jump this nerdy kid. My son and his buddy gavin basically got in the middle and told these 4 kids that if they messed with this kid that they had to deal with them as well...lol The kids took off and the nerdy kids told his parents and they went to the principal with the story. I'm not sure if my kid is a saint or just likes to fight:D

Last year (7th grade) my kid is brand new to the school and makes friends quick. We get a call half way through the year and they said that Logan choked a kid out at lunch. His mom and I are like WTF is going on and haul ass to school as this is not a normal deal for our kid. We show up and i guess the story was one of the bigger kids in the school (he is friends with my kid from PE) started harassing everyone that he was a bad ass and no one could choke him out. Logan is a stud athlete so the kid wouldn't let up and eventually my kid gets him in a headlock. The kid outweighs Logan by 50lbs and Logan locks in a head lock and drops him in a couple seconds. Kit is 100% out and hits the floor and my kid freaks i think he thought he killed him...lol The entire school freaks out teachers, coaches and law enforcement show. When we show the VP, officer and counselor are there with my kid in the office and i'm like oh shit he's getting kicked out and i'm getting sued. Luckily the entire thing was all caught on camera and my kids story and how the kid was hounding everyone is in plain site. The VP was super cool and he didn't get in any trouble but they asked him not to choke anymore kids...haha

Before we left the officer and counselor ask me if he trains mma and I said no he just plays sports but some of his friends do so I'm sure they mess around. Counselor says he has been doing mma training for a number of years and he was impressed as that's the fastest he has ever seen someone go to sleep.....bizzaro world :D

Him and the kid he choked out are still buddies and the story made it's rounds so everyone knows him now..lmao
 

Boatymcboatface

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Does this stuff happen in private school? Just curious.

A lot of the responses are from California folk, how are other states? I'm planning on moving to Texas and know bulling will be there too, but curious if it's as prevalent.

You notice for sure, the bully's are always poor.
We’re do you thing parents sent there troubled kids!? Every new student had some stories about all the shit they did at public school and that’s how they ended up at private!

I went to both public and private school during middle and high school. I can tell you for sure that this and way worse goes on at private schools. Way more money and access to drugs and fun stuff! I have some great stories of all the shit I did with my private school friends! Then I got to public school my sophomore year and showed all the kids the shit that we did at private schools. They were a shocked!

The craziest friends that I have and still hang out with are the ones a made at private school!
 

Tremor Therapy

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Tough situation to be sure, and I feel your concern. I put my kids in karate when they both turned 5. I wanted them to learn self-discipline, hand-eye coordination, and gain some confidence as they learned new skills and moved up through the levels. Never really thinking that either of them would ever need to use it for self-defense.

And sure enough when my son was in 5th grade, he had a situation with 3 wannabe gang-banger bullies. Fortunately, he was able to quickly get out of the situation, but he bloodied one kids nose. It was a big deal with the parents and kids being called into the office, there were parental threats, etc. During the office fiasco, a witness to the event came forth and told the principle that my son was being attacked by three bullies. After a bunch of conversation and other nonsense, it did not matter, the principle said they had a zero-tolerance fighting policy, and my son's punishment was a mandatory 5-day suspension.

By that time I was really pissed off and yelled at the other families and the principle, "what should my son have done, just stand there and let these bullies abuse him?" I had had enough and I praised my son in front of the principle and the other kids' parents for not becoming a victim, and I let all of them know they would be hearing from our lawyer. In the end, things calmed down, there were apologies all around, my son was not suspended (the other 3 were), and he did not have any further issues.

The moral to the story is that there are no winners in this. My son was fortunate enough that he had some training and the ability to not become a victim. I have always told me kids, if it is going to go down, be aggressive and be quick, we will sort it out later. I wish there were better alternatives, but this is the world we live in now.
 

endobear

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No one gets expelled anymore. You have to go to jail/juvenile hall to be removed from school. After your time there, you go back to public school. Thanks to GW Bush, everyone deserves the right to equal education. If a district does not offer an alternative program (with transportation), they must be returned to the regular ed classroom. I have said it before, the ONLY way that will change is when parents start suing the school district because their child is being denied an education due to the constant disruptions from those students. I would say that most of the disruptors have some sort of handicap or learning disability. That means that currently, they have more rights than mainstream students. Ask your kids if this is occurring. The kids probably won't come out and tell you because they think it is normal.
Summer of 1992 there was a kid at school I had beef with from the year before. Had to leave a few parties that summer]
do to this dude and his (wrestling) buddies telling kids they were going to jump me if I was there.
Lunch on the 1st day of school my senior year I see his crew sitting in there car.
I have my boys now to back me up so I approach the car and call him out.
We scrap. I end up getting pretty jacked up but he leaves in an ambulance.
I ended up getting suspended for 5 days and charged with agrivated assault and spent 7 days over spring break in jail as I was 18 and he was 17.
I ended up becoming friends with the other 4 dudes in the car and am still to this day good friends with 2 of them.
 

Ultra...Good

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No one gets expelled anymore. You have to go to jail/juvenile hall to be removed from school. After your time there, you go back to public school. Thanks to GW Bush, everyone deserves the right to equal education. If a district does not offer an alternative program (with transportation), they must be returned to the regular ed classroom. I have said it before, the ONLY way that will change is when parents start suing the school district because their child is being denied an education due to the constant disruptions from those students. I would say that most of the disruptors have some sort of handicap or learning disability. That means that currently, they have more rights than mainstream students. Ask your kids if this is occurring. The kids probably won't come out and tell you because they think it is normal.
This is so true. I have an employee that is a full-time teacher that works with me (for me, we all work together) about 2 months in the summer. She works in a "bad" part of Green Bay, WI and the things she will tell you....... Had her purse stolen twice, car stolen once, fights break out on a regular basis over nothing more than someone scuffing their shoes (they call them kicks). Oh yeah, she teaches 2nd grade. 2nd freaking grade.

She loves what she does, but it is wearing on her. I can see it. She knows it. She loves connecting with the few and far between that she reaches, but she really loves working with me in the summer because she just shows up and works. No political or whatever BS. If she has a problem with anything, talk to me, problem solved. Working for the school district................could not do it myself.

Hats off to those that do.
 

Wedgy

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This course of action was my 1st thought. Decided I really don't want to go to jail again for assault and it wasn't what I wanted to teach my son.
Bummer this is happening. Dad getting his ass kicked is not the solution, as you well know. Kid needs to send a message.

This is not particularly good advice, but it works.

There is one guaranteed way this stops. With the Bully in the crosshairs, blindside attack that Sunuvabitch cold.

Slam his ass directly into a steel fence post, then proceed to mercilessly erase his face on the chain link fence. He will stop. People will be very shocked, not fully knowing what one is capable of.
The lesson taught will last for years.

Plus any Faggot Groomer teacher in that school will think twice about being alone with the boy.
 

Caydens Cat

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Damn! One thing is clear here on RDP. We love living these stories… as we all have a few. Life lessons one way or another.
 

endobear

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Little bit more info on the trip.
Teacher was barley around. Drove by himself and did half the hikes if that with the kids. 3 Counselors that supervised the hole deal are the local rec center trec coaches. Young hippy type.
Teasing has continued since back at school but only from 1 kid. His mom works at the school.
Started doing my physical therapy routine with him but he's not interested. His twin sister is down to pound...
I'm thinking I'm more pissed about it than him.
 

Angler

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Little bit more info on the trip.
Teacher was barley around. Drove by himself and did half the hikes if that with the kids. 3 Counselors that supervised the hole deal are the local rec center trec coaches. Young hippy type.
Teasing has continued since back at school but only from 1 kid. His mom works at the school.
Started doing my physical therapy routine with him but he's not interested. His twin sister is down to pound...
I'm thinking I'm more pissed about it than him.
Hope things work out for your Son and yourself.
 

Wedgy

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Little bit more info on the trip.
Teacher was barley around. Drove by himself and did half the hikes if that with the kids. 3 Counselors that supervised the hole deal are the local rec center trec coaches. Young hippy type.
Teasing has continued since back at school but only from 1 kid. His mom works at the school.
Started doing my physical therapy routine with him but he's not interested. His twin sister is down to pound...
I'm thinking I'm more pissed about it than him

Good deal. 1 on 1 now. Granted, my episode was in a private school in 1966. Things were different then. Would probably be considered extreme now. I've had worse done to me, by three. Epic payback. Feed the Pirate once, He'll keep coming back until the price is too high. Even Jesus told the Herdsman to bear a sword to protect his flock.
 

brgrcru

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One hard hit like a hammer motion to top of nose . Or same motion to color bone .
Have him Practice on a bob bag .
Confidence is key .
 

brgrcru

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For me it was always after school at church parking lot. Or upper field with a big crowd.

Ahh middle school the memories . The worst age group 5–8 th grade . Some are Little Pos .

One thing . I taught both kids was how to Handel themselves .
 

jetboatperformance

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No reason or excuse for parents NOT to put a stop to this , recently had a short lived incident with my Grandson being picked on by a peer (of color) , He's "Spectrum" and doesnt get it but knew it wasnt right My son put a stop to it with school officials .... Looking back one of my regrets in life was not stepping in when my Son complained about similar issues 30 years ago I just figured he'd slug it out like I did at that age . I had a neighbor kid (a bit older) that bullied me My Old man had me take him on and I got the shit beat out of Me I will say I learned a few things ..... not to fight fair ,,,,,,,BTW Adult bullies still prominently exist , anymore they just hide behind keyboards
 
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Mandelon

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Those were the worst times in school. The memories last a lifetime.

My kids didn't seem to deal with any physical issues, but my daughter had a really good friend that suddenly turned on her in high school. I think her boyfriend maybe liked my daughter. That was hard to watch. She was so sad. As a parent you know that these things help toughen up your kid, but it is still difficult to go through for both of you.

I had a couple incidents like that. Maybe fourth or fifth grade a bigger kid was bullying me for a while. I finally had enough and fought back. He thought that was great and said that was all he wanted. He left me alone after that. It's not like I hurt him or anything. He was kinda weird.

Later on in Junior High a taller kid was messing with me and I had enough, He was trying to push me but I dodged it. I pushed his arm up and put a leg behind him and pushed him backwards. He fell and I dropped on his chest hard with my knee and grabbed his throat as hard as I could. Told him to leave me alone or I was gonna fuck him up. He assumed I knew what I was doing. LOL He never bothered me again.
 

Gelcoater

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He's real thin and pretty uncoordinated right now. H
I don’t think either of them are uncoordinated?
He may be a little as his body continues to grow.
I’ve seen the kid ride the dunes.
He’s coordinated.
He and his sister have got their junk stuck in the dunes as many times as @RiverDave but they were only 8😎

Should be noted both of them did pretty well in the youth Ninja Warrior deal pre Covid.
They’re coordinated😎👍

I dint think he needs to lift weights.
Save that for after he’s grown up.
He needs to work on speed. And throwing a solid punch and the muscle memory first.
Get him a bag.
We have one out back.
It’s great for burning off some FUCK! now and then. And builds the muscle memory.
 

2FORCEFULL

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So talked with him a bit more about it. Apparently it's been going on at school but not as bad.
Grabbing his food at lunch and slamming his locker closed when he opens it. He's been carrying all his books so he doesn't have to stop at his locker any more. I should have known something was up when he was asking about breaking out my old freeweight crap.
He's on board with doing some martial arts training.
here's the best thing to do,... get him out of that school... complaining to the school will do nothing but make it worse..... school is a short time of a persons life and having to make adjustments for lawless kids will only get worse.... I would back him in the best way to live... peacefull and respectful... schools letting this shit happen is what scars a person for life... I pulled both my kids out of public schools for just this reason... they did on line school and went one day a week to home room... they also went to welding and auto tech classes.... my youngest , the one who played hockey,... got jumped by 2 punks in the 7th grade... he beat the shit out of both and put one in a coma for 5 days.... he also went to boxing 3 days a week... and worked out with pit fighters... that when I stopped the learning to fight... and just got him away from the bullys.... fighting is a bad road in todays times.... teaching him to walk away is a better lesson.... but do your part.... get him out of that mess..... nothing wrong with raising polite and respectfull kids....
 

LuauLounge

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Most of the time, it's calling their bluff. Had a kid bothering me as a freshman in high school. Only did it away from school, like after the bus drop off. I confronted him in the gym locker room, yelled I'm tired of your shit and we went at it for a nanosecond before the coach broke it up.
Never bothered me or anyone else that I knew.
 

2FORCEFULL

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here's the real problem...teaching your kid to retaliate .... thats a bad lesson...could end up dead way before their time... there's always a moment when you can just walk away...dropping your kid off everyday to deal with conflicts leaves scares that don't go away... I went to the school when my son dan got expelled... on the way to the office I noticed that all the white kids walked around looking at the ground.... so I asked the dean what was up with that??? I was told that the white kids were not allowed to make eye contact with the black kids,... she said that was how the fights started... the gangs at school run the school, and the staff allows it.... she said they constantly take guns away from kids at school... that was the day I took my son out of the school... none of my 3 sons every get in fights...where as I was taught to retaliate ... lots of nights in jail,... looking back @ 70 years of life.... never once did it do any good to whip some ones ass,... or get an ass whippen...

of the group of kids that were my sons age...... 70% ended up on herion... 1 out of 10 committed suicide.. and most are fighting drug addiction... 7th grade kids need constant supervision... they need to have goals set , something for their idle minds.. my youngest played travel hockey, they teach them to drop the gloves...even though new hockey they are trying to loose that image... fighting is a big part...

all my sons do well,.. and of all the kids that stayed at that school, none did well,.. they all went though years of troubled times before they cleared their heads and went forward with things that matter in life... kids, nor the parrents get to choose what kids learn or are exposed to at public schools, then throw in the internet to further fog their brains... so what I'm saying,.. teaching kids that they have to retaliate to make it in life is wrong... I call the 7th grade as the start of the wonder years... do your part to make them useful in life.... dropping the gloves doesn't work in real life... there's always a time when you could have just walked away and avoided the situation..

If the teachers and staff can't control what happens at school,,,, you sure as hell can't from home...
 

Mike K

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Here’s what worked for me in the 7th grade.
I had to get past the fear of actually taking a punch.
I had no idea how many punches a human being could take.
What would happen if the bully hit me 3 or 4 times real hard ?
What if he scarred my face for life?
I was stuck doing nothing … until I took some punches and saw my skin heal.
One thing I wish I knew then was … all I had to do is to get 1 decent hit in.
Just one.
Then maybe two.
Then maybe three.
”And !“ Maybe even throw the first to punch.
Why stick your face out there first to be “correct” ?
It turns out that it ain’t so bad.
Realistically a 7th grade bully would probably move on if the guy he was picking on always hit back … even if the fighting back was not so good.
I never had anyone teach me how to defend myself.
I had no clue what to do.
I wish my Mom put me into “boxing” class and learned how to defend myself.
Not martial arts … seriously … both my girls got their green belts but not in real life fighting.
So your kid is skinny and nerdy … so what? … secretly he wants to be able to defend himself and fight back.
But without knowing how … it’s easier to just take it and hope it won’t last long.
So I’d put him in Boxing classes ASAP and encourage him to take a punch and give one.
Again … IMHO … not Martial Arts ... It takes waaaay too long to learn anything whereas learning to box is very rewarding and easier for a 7th grade mind to get around.
Good luck.
 

2FORCEFULL

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there's a prison full of guys that learned to fight everyone that fuc'd with them... better to learn to de fuse the situation and walk away... I've told my sons that I'm perfectly happy with them never ever getting into a fight again.. of all the fights I've been , here's what was learned and taught to others... I'm a lunitic.... and not smart enough to be scared... just like the guy that broke my jaw... I could have stopped that from happening if I would have just went the other way... , he even said, why didn't you just run instead of coming forward...... I told him my knees hurt too bad to run, does he have respect for me... hell yeah..... but who really gives a fuc what he thinks anyway

like I said,... the smart people are those that can avoid and defuse these type of deals... I know a lot of people that have never been in a fight in their whole lives... they do just fine...
 

JD D05

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I have never understood the idea of letting someone else make the first move..

End of the day it’s your word against his.. I’d have him throat punch the cocksucker then stomp the shit out of him with the advantage..

Then when it’s over I’d tell him to say “he swung at me and missed”.

Why he a victim, when you are already

Back in 8th grade this kid at lunch told me my mom was a whore and he hated me for some reason. So after lunch we happen to have the next class together. We'll class starts and it was some sort of quite work time. Stood up walked over to his desk and nailed that fucker 3 times before he knew what hit him.
 

2FORCEFULL

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here's another thing I learned raising my 3 sons.... at 13 they all three were at differant levels of maturity....what worked for one didn't work for others... also learned this about parents with sports and school... there's a multitude of parents that live through their kids,... most of them were bullied, and were poor at sports,.. most are over weight slobs that demand excellent performace from their kids.... most had never been in a fight in their lives, but pit their kids into retaliation, as in you go kick that kids ass or your gonna get an ass whippen when you get home... some kids are fighters... some are not.... the ones that are,.. are the ones that you find yourseft at the deans office all the time... it's ok to have a nice kid... even if you got your ass whippen everyday at school.... your kid will never right that for you... ease up parents... let the kid mature ,
 

dribble

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there's a prison full of guys that learned to fight everyone that fuc'd with them... better to learn to de fuse the situation and walk away... I've told my sons that I'm perfectly happy with them never ever getting into a fight again.. of all the fights I've been , here's what was learned and taught to others... I'm a lunitic.... and not smart enough to be scared... just like the guy that broke my jaw... I could have stopped that from happening if I would have just went the other way... , he even said, why didn't you just run instead of coming forward...... I told him my knees hurt too bad to run, does he have respect for me... hell yeah..... but who really gives a fuc what he thinks anyway

like I said,... the smart people are those that can avoid and defuse these type of deals... I know a lot of people that have never been in a fight in their whole lives... they do just fine...
I get it but there are an overwhelming number of posts here where the bullied kid fought back and never got bullied again. I was small in the ninth grade and for me it took one well placed left hook to stop a bully from fucking with me me in the locker room. Slammed him right into the lockers. He looked at me in disbelief then never bothered me again. My stepson used to brag about a group of about four of his friends who used to go out looking to get in fights on Friday nights (post high school). I told him it wouldn't last long because one night they were going to pick a fight with the wrong people. A couple of weeks later these guys literally got their asses beat. They decided not to do that anymore. When I had my CCW interview the officer asked me when was the last time I had been in a fight. I told him in my early to mid twenties, then chuckled and said I think I had my ass handed to me. He laughed and approved my application.

One more note. The former elected Sheriff in Sacramento county has a radio talk show. He once said that in the 80's / early 90's they would disqualify candidates who had a history of fighting. Then they realized they had put a bunch of deputies on the street who had never been in a fight. When a subject tried to fight them, they didn't know what to do. It never ended good. In a certain sense I believe this could be why police are so quick to shoot these days. They grew up in the era where you got in big trouble for fighting even when you were defending yourself.
 

CLdrinker

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So whatever happens to the posters kid?

Did he throat punch the bully or what?
 

PaPaG

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One thing for sure, make sure you reaffirm your sons great achievements in school along with his grades, make sure to teach him that one day he will be at the top of the food chain and not a typical loser that most bullies become when they grow up. My Dad taught me to fight when needed, to always protect the innocent, weak and helpless, he would never get mad when I got in trouble at school for fighting after I explained the situation, he knew I never started fights but part of me loved to fight bullies and to defend people that could not. He also taught me to use my brain and by the sounds of it your son has the brains. Keep supporting him and do what ever it takes to help him learn how to deal with the bullies.
 
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endobear

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So whatever happens to the posters kid?

Did he throat punch the bully or what?
Spoke with the campus cop briefly. He knows who these boys are and is going to keep an eye on them. Alao mentioned my son needs to join his boxing class year after next. Its actually an elective. Got a call from the school guidance counselor the next day. He's going to talk to the outdoor lab teacher and the Trek counselors and let them know that they need to keep a better control of the kids on these trips.
Says he will keep my sons name out of the conversation.

My son says there are about 5 of them this kid messes with. He's become friends with a couple and they are sticking together at lunch.
Took my rotties with me to pick him up the other day.
Waited outside the school and when he came out I handed him the leash for the big one. He had tons of girls running up to him wanting to meet/pet his babies and talking to him. JR High and High School girls. Total confidence booster. He was all giddy.
At the same time I had him point out the shit bird to me and made sure he knew he was being pointed out/talked about. We will see what happens from here.
 

endobear

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here's the best thing to do,... get him out of that school... complaining to the school will do nothing but make it worse..... school is a short time of a persons life and having to make adjustments for lawless kids will only get worse.... I would back him in the best way to live... peacefull and respectful... schools letting this shit happen is what scars a person for life... I pulled both my kids out of public schools for just this reason... they did on line school and went one day a week to home room... they also went to welding and auto tech classes.... my youngest , the one who played hockey,... got jumped by 2 punks in the 7th grade... he beat the shit out of both and put one in a coma for 5 days.... he also went to boxing 3 days a week... and worked out with pit fighters... that when I stopped the learning to fight... and just got him away from the bullys.... fighting is a bad road in todays times.... teaching him to walk away is a better lesson.... but do your part.... get him out of that mess..... nothing wrong with raising polite and respectfull kids....
I get what your saying but I'm not pulling him out over this crap. If it got real bad. Maybe. I don't want him to learn to run from his problems. I' also dont want him to retaliate, just stand up for himself.
We had him in a homeschooling program last year. In person Tuesday and Thursday and the rest of the week he was on his own at home.
He hated it and wanted to go back to full time normal school. His twin sister is still doing the homeschooling.
 

TCHB

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Does this stuff happen in private school? Just curious.

A lot of the responses are from California folk, how are other states? I'm planning on moving to Texas and know bulling will be there too, but curious if it's as prevalent.

You notice for sure, the bully's are always poor.
I can tell you it does but student will be removed. Problem goes back on the parents.
 

Ultra...Good

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Cannot believe I forgot about this. There was a bully at my elementary school that was a year older then me. He picked on everyone because he could. I was averaged size and put up a fight and even though he would get the best of me, I was not a soft target so for the most part he left me alone. He kept picking on other kids and parents complained, nothing was really done because the kid was seeing Dr's because he was hyper active. This was in a private school but as long as he did not do anything in school, nobody really cared. I only had to deal with it until I was twelve and he went onto high school, wherever that was.

Anyways, fast forward about four years and the guy was out with some other class mates right before graduation and dove into water that was way too shallow. Ended up in a wheel chair and if he is still alive, he will still be in that chair. Not that I wish it upon him or can even say that I was glad to hear about this, but what goes around comes around. Karma can be a bitch.
 
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